What?
I’m a natural.
CLEARLY.
*blink blink*
WHAAAAAAT?!
Alright. Maybe I’ve blown me a bit out of proportion.
(Did I just call me fat?)
A ONE time model.
That picture right there is from a photo shoot I went on… for Rivet & Sway, a swanky, affordable and RAD new shop-from-home eyewear company.
But they didn’t take that picture.
I did.
YOU KNOW HOW I AM.
If you look over my right shoulder.
MY RIGHT.
Your left…
You can see (blurry) Angie Cox of YouLookFab.com (the blonde) (I MET HER!) (I also wanted to take a picture of her outfit because – THAT GIRL KNOWS HOW HOW TO PUT AN OUTFIT TOGETHER!) (but I didn’t) (I didn’t want to seem like a creeper) (And there I was in my Kohls-whatever-brand jeans and an Old Navy shirt) (with a STAIN) (and a snag) (I can’t make this stuff up) (INTERVENTION MUCH?!) (she was so gracious) (and her lovely accent) (I have a crush)…
And the woman behind the camera… the woman who took probably 100 pictures of me and my one big eye? Barbara Kinney. She has pretty much only had her photography on the cover of Time and Newsweek and was a staff photog for the White House during the Clinton Admin.
*I die*
I’m glad I didn’t know about her impressive impresivenessess until after I cheesed it up. Jeeesh, people. It is physically impossible for me to behave seriously.
Oh. AND ALSO I feel a little lame because I had to ask her for her name a second time. “Hey, what was your name again?”
Charlie Sheen Winning, much?
And Barb? Yes, she let me call her Barb (we’re tight like that, BARB AND I…) A simply delightful woman… And sooooo not, “You don’t even know how impressed you should be with me right now.”
Below is a picture of Angie… probably looking at a photo of me, thinking about how photogenic I am. And that is Barb, working her magic behind the lens…
And in the picture below, far left is Britt Stromberg of Wordslinger (she wins for coolest site name EVAR) … with Angie and Barb (we’re besties now)… I *think* they are trying to decide if I do, in fact, have one eye that is bigger than the other…
Let me help you out ladies… I DO NOT. I have one eye OPENING that is bigger than the other.
That is what the doctor told me.
The shoot was at a studio in Pioneer Square in Seattle. I asked Adam, the owner, who rents the space out to photographers… if he would rent the space out to , say ME (LIKE I HAVE MONEY) for a birthday party… for SAY AN UPCOMING 40th?
But he said something about how parties are a little rough on spaces like that and then I had a flashback to The 20th Anniversary of my 16th Birthday and I nodded in agreement. So I decided maybe I will have my party at a roller rink, and keep his space as the place where my modeling career will continue to grow.
Whaaaat?
But back to me.
Wait.
Hey!
Speaking of eyewear… have you see the Frames and Fortune dress at Modcloth *GUSH*!
Anyone want to buy a girl a dress?
Only $244.99 – ACT NOW!
That dress is a *skosh* out of my “When I splurge I buy a t-shirt dress at Target or Old Navy for full price” price range.
I digress.
Aaaaaanywho… Despite my stain, and name issues… everyone was SO nice to this first-time model. Let’s just cross our fingers this is the beginning of  my career  AS A MODEL!
My gosh, guys. I CAN HEAR YOU.
Stop laughing already.
Yeeesh.
Did you know I HAVE NEVER RECEIVED SO MANY COMPLIMENTS IN ONE HOUR IN ALL MY LIFE.
IN. ALL. MY. LIFE. PEOPLE.
I want that everyday.
*wipes tear of fulfillment*
PLUS, I got to practice receiving compliments!
When all the complimenting was all said and done, I hopped on the ferry and headed back home… You know, where the 2 day-old bacon grease in a pan waited for my cleansing touch. And other glamorous things like ballet lessons and shopping for wool socks (Yes. WOOL SOCKS … from glam to wool socks in 3 hours flat). And at one point… because 20 minutes of modeling and receiving compliments and wool sock shopping  is SO HARD… I laid on my floor in exhaustion.
Nothing like a wood floor to relax tired muscles.
And then Kevin (the dog) came over to try to lick me to death (he loves me) and I made him knock it the heck off … so then he got mad and wouldn’t look at me:
Kevin. He is so sensitive.
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