Make Me Laugh Monday: Le Mother's Day

My Mother’s Day gifts made me laugh. I want to share with you because… well… I am not is school anymore and where else can I go to get my “Show and Tell” on?

My 8 year old daughter made a card at school… the directions were to draw a picture of her and me doing something special together:

One word: ACCESSORIES!!!!!!!!!!!

My favorite part of the card was where she filled in the blanks:

• You are good at so many things. Here are 3 of them: teaching me how to blog, jump roping, fashion

• May favorite thing that you and I do together: shopping, working on my homework, cook

• You make me feel good when: you bake cookies with me, you shop with me, you go to the mall with me

• If I could buy anything in the world for you, I’d give you: a hard top BMW convertible, a real diamond necless, a new iPhone

THAT is MY girl.

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My son gave me 2 certificates – 5 hours of labor (I was all, DUDE. 5? I was in labor with YOU for 29!)… and also one for peace and quiet on demand for Mother’s Day. You better believe I used THAT one. Alls I had to say was, “Don’t ruin my day, buddy. Don’t.”

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My 5 year old daughter gave me this:

That made me smile.

And then she knocked the marigold off my nightstand.

And I have to ask, would it REALLY have been Mother’s Day without a good spill?

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Speaking of spills… my friend Lisa and I went to Seattle on Saturday night for a Mother’s Day night out… not on Mother’s Day, but the day/night before. And my poor friend Lisa.

SHE. Fell.

On First Ave… thick with traffic. Thick. I saw her go down. It was slow… so slow I remember having time to think, “Surely she will not go all the way. Fa realz? She will not full-on fa….”

Being the compassionate I am… I tried VERY hard not to laugh. Because if I snort, then that makes her pee, and if she peed… that meant our Mom’s Mother’s Day Out The Night Before Mother’s Day would be ruined!

In other words: I tried not to laugh not because I was compassionate, but because there was no way OUR NIGHT was going to get peed on ruined.

Poor Lisa. I don’t know why she loves me. I am a HORRIBLE friend. Despite my best efforts to neither laugh nor snort, I nearly needed to call for back-up. Or oxygen. I think I tore an ab too.

And we were both thankful for compassionate strangers. Like the ones who held theri *guffaw* until we were out of hearing range.

Or like the lady that brought Lisa her shoe.

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Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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