ARE YOU KIDDING ME, GOOGLE??? !!!!!

Listen.

I am as capable as the next gal. I am not afraid of new things. When I moved here, I’d go on drives alone, practically daring myself to get lost just so I could find my way back. This was before Google Maps… but not before chat rooms… I digress…

I’m down for a good challenge, yo. I have 3 kids. You can’t scare me.

But.

I like to be prepared. I like to do a good job. I like to be praised for being prepared and doing a good job. Normal stuff.

So when my daughter’s teacher asked if I’d help with the upcoming 2nd grade picnic – by helping with face painting – I experienced something strange – FEAR. WHAT IF I RUIN THE PICNIC?

Because this IS about me, right?

So I decided to search the interwebz. Sure… I can make hearts, balloons, rainbows… stars…. STICK PEOPLE. But I want more… I need to be adored. The children deserve to be WOWWED.

I did a random “face painting” Google search and found fancy circus-face faces. #notgonnahappen #supernot

So. I decided to try a long-string Google search:

Ka. Ching! Right?

Wrong.

Shall I show you one of the top images suggested? *rubs eyes*

What the?

*blinking*

If the image and search results weren’t on the laptop I love and hold dear… I might have drop-kicked Google.

Jerk.

********

Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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