Will I Be Taller Tomowwow?

This is what you asked me yesterday while eating lunch.

I had to answer truthfully, “No, honey. Just because you turn 5 tomorrow doesn’t mean you will be taller.” And because you have an answer or commentary for EVERYTHING and because you will not let no one put they thumb on yo back… you replied, “But I FEEL taller.”

image credit: Lucy

Of course you do. That is the joy of 4 going on 5. You get to FEEL it all. You get to express it all. You get *squeeeeee* and whine and giggle and cry without one bit of concern for how cool you look. What your heart feels, you have the privilege of expressing for all the world to hear and see.

And you do. Mercy on all the earth… You. Do.

All year long I have been watching you grow into, and now out of the fullness of being four. Your vocabulary has changed. Your pants have become capris. You pointed out yesterday that your chin is above the kitchen counter.

Big stuff is happening. Big.

Your sentences are more complex… your observances more defined. As are your questions. I love not only watching you grow, but also listening to you grow.

My Lucy. My surprise baby. You are the last to give me notable motherhood moments… the last I nursed, the last diaper change, the last butt thermometer experience (yeah, we’re all glad that’s over!), the last stroller push, the last one I laid in a crib, and one day – far sooner than later now… the last to hold tight on my hip.

I rejoice in your growth, but long for some of those moments I will never have back.

But keep growing, baby. Keep growing.

Your job is to grow. I will do my best to not get in the way. But, rest assured, I will remind you who your mother is if you think you want to grow too far away from me. That’s my job

Lucy, you have a spark… an enviable spark I pray stays at full intensity your entire life. I pray the fighting spirit I see in you now will endure – to keep that spark lit. Life has a way of slowly snuffing out joy and innocence and “spark”. My prayer for you is that the dynamic little girl I see in you today… will become the dynamic woman I know is forming. I pray for your protection – physically, emotionally, spiritually, creatively… When I watch and listen to you play, I am astounded by your creativity. Your passion. I long for you to live freely… to have full access and engagement with the wonder you see all around. I pray. I pray. I pray…

My gosh, little girl… I love you. You give me SUCH joy. Thank you. Thank you for being my reminder to soak up life. Thank you for adding laughter and perspective and stories. Girl. You have given me some stories. I thank you in advance for letting me publish many of them in the interwebz. I’m sure we’ll be discussing this over coffee someday…

photo credit: Lucy

but for now… We discuss things over hot chocolate.

And how I cherish those moments with you. You know what Lucy? I cherish every moment with you.

Happy Fifth Birthday, darlin…

Lucy LOVE her some marshmawwows!

Love,

Mom