So…

It’s 10:30 and I’m punching-out finely crafting this-here post.

You see, my friend Janice over there at 5 Minutes for Mom…

This is We.

She lovingly, professionally, flatteringlyly, and beautifully published How to Become a (Blogging) Star….

And I realized, “GAH! What if her people click over and the first post that greets them is the one about my funk?! And I’m not talking Funky Town funk… I want my new friends to find something SPARKLY!”

*scratches arm*

*scratches leg*

*scratches elbow*

Well new friends… I have a little problem.

I think my youngest may have brought a POX into our home.

A pox of the chicken variety.

But I don’t know for sure. The bumps surfaced on my eczema-prone daughter’s skin a couple of hours ago.

Definitely NOT eczema-ish, but the last time I looked at the Chicken Poxies I was knee high to a person with knees.

So. Here I sit. Scratching. Not unlike when one hears lice is going around at the elementary school.

Itching.

Itching.

Dr. Google is a filthy man, FYI.

So… I went on the Facebook. I shared my potential dilemma. My friend linked to a pic she took when one of her kids had The Poxies.

Ah geeze.

Hitherhencetofore, I headed into Lucy’s room. Flipped on the lights. Tore off her covers and took a flashlight to her torso.

Maybe in the morning…

*scratch scratch scratch*

So.

New friends.

Hi.

My name is Jenny. I am in my late-to-vibrant 30′s and I am given over to the power of suggestion.

*scratch scratch scratch*

YOU KNOW WHAT?!

I noticed a pimple on my clavicle today.

WHAT IF IT’S NOT A PIMPLE???!!!

I’m sorry. I should be a better hostess. Pimples and poxes… I am so rude.

*scratch scratch*

Usually, I like to offer coffee, but I kind a feel like maybe I should pour you a handful of calamine lotion? Perhaps a scoop of warm oatmeal?

OHMYSTINKIN’HECKICANNOTSTOPITCHING!!!! FORTHELOVEOF….

*eep*

********

Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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