Now I am a Dream Interpreter?

by | Dec 1, 2010 | Life | 2 comments

I’ve been dreaming a lot lately. There was one recently about the dad of one of my kids’ classmates… *random*…who was the Incredible Hulk and he had to hold his breath so he could go invisible so as not to scare the children while decorating cookies.

?

And I had to tell him (in the dream) that is was really awkward to hold a conversation with an invisible person who was unable to breathe. And then I felt all-bad for having to call him out on his shortcomings… You know, being green and invisible, unable to speak due to breath-holding and whathaveyou. “Not a great way to make friends and conversation”, I say to him…

?

Dreams have a reputation for being weird.

dreams are weird

Just yesterday, my friend Barb left a note on my Facebook wall telling me she had quite an odd dream about Jyl, Maia and Me… Something about Jyl wearing wrong colors and me being mad about her about that… and Barb hid, and…

She blames it on her cold medicine.

I can’t blame cold medicine. I blame exhaustion. But there is one dream I need to blame on guilt and diet and body image issues. Or maybe it was the tryptophan.

Let’s just say November has helped me pack on a 5 pound “winter coat”. And maybe I am feeling a little bit sensitive/aware/ticked-off/obsessed about it.

So.

My dream.

In it, I hopped out of bed to get dressed and notice my support undergarment overflowethed. I told myself I was only dreaming.

In my dream.

I proceeded to get dressed. Forcing things to be contained in too-small containers. *ahem*

Once the girls were strapped down, I met up with my friend Stacey. Before she even could say hello – she stepped back. WAAAAAAAAY back.

Whoa there, Jenny…

Her arms flailed… like the sight of me sent her off balance. Like someone walking on trying not to fall off a tight rope.

DUDE. DID YOU GET A BOOB JOB?

Like, YESTERDAY???!!!

I stood aghast. Then ashamed.

It was at this point IN my dream that my dream interpreted itself…

I replied flatly, with head-hung low… “No. I’ve been eating too much stuffing, and… Listen. It’s been a busy month. And theeeeeeese are where I gain all my weight.”

*end dream*

Just remember, dreams are not an accurate picture of reality.

Just feel I need to say that.

Aaaaanywho. I recently received a coupon to receive a FREE dream interpretation. I guess there’s money in that business. Looks like… I may need to update my LinkedIn, ya’ll.

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Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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