May, You Are Drunk

by | May 8, 2014 | Life | 1 comment

Dear May,

You are drunk.

Sincerely,

Me

I have all kinds of thoughts running through my head so I cannot guarantee any respectful level of coherency.

There’s that one saying about March coming in like a lion and going out like a lamb… Instead I would like to say that MAY is coming in like a lion.

And will be also going out like a lion.

I already can’t with this month.

Every day of this week I have said at one point, “I am not going to cry.”

And we are only on day 8.

I don’t write this as a ploy for sympathy.

I am not seeking advice.

I do not think I am more busy (thus more important) that anyone else.

Why is busy-ness often equated with importance?

I digress.

I write this because I don’t know what else to do.

What I hate the most about seasons like these is I feel like an “I’m so busy” jerk-face.

I hate that the days are packed so very full that there is no margin for emergency or need.

No room to act in friendship.

No room for patience for my dawdling 9 year old.

Panic. Hurry. Panic. Hurry.

Fixers would say, “Don’t schedule so much!”

Other ladies who are pitching a tent in the same crazy camp as me would join me in telling those fixers, “Shut it.”

If the answer was so simple. One would think it would be as simple as not taking on so much.

But sometimes a life with 3 kids, 2 spouses with jobs, a house on the market (I REPEAT: A HOUSE ON THE MARKET), the end of the school year, etc and whathaveyou… there are just things that are beyond your control and before you know it you find yourself standing face to face with your son… trying to figure out how to make the schedule for the next day work even a little and all you can tell him is, “I’m not going to cry. I am not going to cry.”

And he takes a step back. Just in case.

He’s smart like that.

You know what I hate more than having my house on the market… being a work-at-home person who has their house on the market.

I used to think laundry would be my undoing.

NOPE. This whole “trying to get work done and having to clean instead of work and not being able to test recipes or get picture because oh yay someone needs to come look at the house during the only good natural light time to take pictures” is what may lead to my ultimate undoing.

First world problems.

Also, PERSPECTIVE.

We all have our health. And a home. And jobs. And and and…

I just need to vent.

I have no other power. The cards have been dealt.

I don’t need solutions. I am DEFCON 800 beyond solutions.

I am in TRIAGE MODE.

It’s not about fixing… the next few weeks are all about surviving and stopping the bleeding.

Hopefully.

Ok. There.

Got it out.

Thanks for letting me vent.

You’re the best.

I’m looking forward to reclaiming life in a few weeks…

Fingers crossed.

 

 

 

 

 

Hi, I'm Jenny :)

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