- December 16, 2008
- 8 Comments
- Fa' Real?, General, Not So Much
Miss Grumpy Pants
I’m feeling a wee-bit like a cranky kermudgeon (andIdon’tcareifIspelledthatwrong). It’s just the little things that are making me feel like I am being continuously ever-so-lightly flicked on the forehead continuously… I have a list. Bitter-miserable souls are good list-makers. At least there is some good in here somewhere.
- The air-brushed fakey perfection of women in the media. As hard as I work to be less fat than I have ever been since hormones took over in the early 80′s… I will never… … … It really sucks being a real woman with a real body (like, never a size 0 – EVER!) in this age of Photoshopped fakeness. We have no appreciation for real beauty because of all the fake- crap we are bombarded with. Makes me want to puke, but not in an eating-disorder sort-of way. See? I am in a bad mood.
- I hate pimples. *holds back profanity*
- Claims like the following just tick me the heck off. They communicate a false sense of hope for the most hopeless of people — parents of sleepless children:
- When my computer freezes. Or is slow. I have things to do and have no time to wait for something like a COMPUTER to take time to think. Sheesh.
- Inanimate objects. I am certain that while I sleep at night all inanimate objects meet to decide how they will orchestrate my emotional undoing. Fragile items jump away as I carry them, drawers “fall” and contents spill, said drawers suddenly become too “fat” for the opening they just fell from, necklaces tangle, packages meant for a 3-year-old to open — behave like Fort Knox, items intended to stay upright tumble… and don’t even get me started on how my wayward floss and braces laugh and taunt me as I make great efforts to be a good patient for my orthodontist…
- Martha Stewart recipes. This is a love-hate thing. She. Makes. Me. Crazy. But for some reason, I can’t quit Martha. {clutches chest}
- People who write in all caps. All. Caps. WHAT? Is that voice immodulation carried over into print?
Voice Immodulation Syndrome from Tony Weber on Vimeo.
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8 Responses to “Miss Grumpy Pants”
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I’m a man and I’m not going to claim to understand the female perception of self. But do know that we menfolk do love curves and the life we all live is beyond what we see and read from the media bombardment of finger down the throat apple commercial glitz and plastic. I know it’s not our (the collective Y chromosome contingent) that you womenfolk are seeking, but just know that happy and creativity are worth more than perfect asses and the maudlin existence we ALL would be under if we followed through with the check the media moguls force down our throats.
I too am so sick of the airbrushed, Photoshop perfection that we are all supposed to diet and exercise to achieve. I workout and watch what I eat but I will never look like any of those actresses or models in magazines or on TV. And it really gets to you some days.
Ooooh. That was well said, furiousball.
Do you think that your grumpiness is snow related? I’m done. I’m stuck in my house, I have shopping to do…I’m done with the snow!
My step-dad is part of the ALL CAPS email contingent. AND he has VIS too. Definitely related.
Check out this post and see if that cheers up your day just an itty bitty bit…
http://forgingahead.wordpress.com/2008/11/28/song-love/
Grumpy-Pants here, too. Bah! Humbug! Can’t we just get this Christmas stuff over with and move on?!?
I made a similar list myself the other day. And I can easily get on a soapbox about what the media is doing to our young girls (& boys).
I abhor pimples!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh I can agree. And yes, I am in the same boat with all things Martha. Want to love her. Want to hate her. What’s a girl to do?
[...] wish I could say I feel better today than yesterday because I am perfectly content with my person/body. I wish it was because I am a deeply deep person [...]