Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter.

I have long been afflicted with a condition called “insecurity”. I was a shy little girl. By high school I found myself in a space I was comfortable in…chubby, but comfortable… and some of the “shyness” began to melt away.

If I look at the big picture of my life, I see pockets of freedom and pockets of shyness. Even in adulthood. Were I a scientist, I might hypothesize that the periods of freedom had a direct correlation to the people I chose to let into my life.

During my perceived “shy” periods, I think I was fearful. I was insecure. I lacked confidence — in who I was or wanted to be. Or my weight held me back. I wavered in my own convictions based on who was around. Acceptance, popularity, inclusion… Familiar much? I think I sought out the wrong people.

But I’m older now. I never thought growing older could be a good thing…

As I have struggled and {to be honest} still struggle with desiring acceptance… life and experience has aged me and I have changed. I have become less guarded, more open, a bit louder, a bit sillier, warmer… free-er… and as a result a bit creative-ier :) My creativity has been given freedom to blossom and in that – I have been given the freedom to live life more fully.

It’s hard though… being able to embrace the freedom I am finding in being be the person I believe God created me to be.  I am self-reflective to a fault. If there is something good about me, I can make that a bad trait. So I search inside looking for faults to work on, not realizing I have been building walls, not actually fixing anything. I have spent years building very thick and high walls that have kept me from being:

Continue reading ‘The Confessional – Insecurity, Freedom and Good Friends’

My friend, Jen… the woman who has only missed 4 of my 37 years of existence — lost her dad to his battle with ALS 2 weeks ago… Ugh.

The whole experience drove home the blessing I have in this life-long friendship…

Jen and I discovered Disneyland together…

We pretended to be ballerinas on the soccer field together…

She gave me her hairbrush cleaning job at the local hair salon my 8th grade year when she had to move to Fresno, and she came to my 8th grade graduation… And we braved the large framed glasses together too….

We were roommates in college. 2 years of… oh there is just too much… This is her in our dorm room our first year… She went with a navy/white theme – I was all pastel-crappy. $100 for Who will be the first person to spy the Caboodle? 1992, yo!

There were weddings and babies. During this span there were 10 years we never saw each other… but anytime we got to talk on the phone it was like no time had passed at all…

Finally, we were physically reunited. We braved BlogHer ‘08 together… And for the first time we drank together. She introduced me to Caroline (on the left in the pic below *Hi girl – miss you!*) as “Drunk”… Jen has always been the quick witted one!

So, with the blessing of my little family at home, I stole away in my minivan and drove 800 miles to be with the friend who is more like a sister.

Here is the video of my trip there:

I would never survive solitary confinement. Never.

*sigh*

I’m not sure if I’ll write about our visit or not. There is just something about the time I was able to spend with Jen and her family… It was like going home. My parents were there too. Our families grew up together… and I’m not so sure I could ever express the depth of sadness and also the joy that was shared over the 2 short days I was there. Besides, I think I may just feel like holding that close. That’s a weird thing for a girl like me :) I suppose even I have limits.

I love you Jen. Deeply.

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Wanna see a picture of a cactus? OK!

I went to Arizona last weekend. My friend Casey turned 40 and she had an 80’s dance party…

But before the party we went on a hike. This is my kind of hiking… wind in your hair…

Open toed shoes… and coffee. I just love hiking with my friends… We are all about safety.

Oh, and let’s not forget about the scorpion suckers for the kids! Again, safety first!

After such extreme physical exertion… and gagging, because my friend’s son ACTUALLY ATE THE SCORPION IN HIS SUCKER…. I needed a prickly pear margarita… #somuch

As if a prickly pear margarita wasn’t enough excitement… I got to see a REAL LIVE….

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Corona chandelier!!!

Wonder of all wonders! I wept.

***In other digressions… today is the last day to enter for a chance to win a $100 Visa gift card courtesy of Tom’s Of Maine! Just visit this post at my review blog to find out how to throw your name into the hat!***

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I think… if one considers being considered “pornworthy” complimentary.

And apparently I do.

Oh dear.

Where to start, where to start…

*scratching head*

I helped my friend Lisa lead a little pep rally at a local private school for their upcoming Knowledge Bole Bowl. Go Smart People!!!

Continue reading ‘I Think I Just Got the Greatest Compliment of My Life’

JD, may I use that phrase? I know you own the whole, “I *insert action here* so you don’t have to” concept. And it’s true! She does it ALL so we don’t have to. She’s a giver like that. She even ate sardines! I would NEVER do that for you… but mostly because my tummy is so full of Oreos and coffee all the time.

Aaaanywho. I digress.

I want to re-post my story about a cleanse I did a little over a year ago, in case you missed it. We are embarking on a season of resolutions. A time when we feel motivated to eat our veggies or purge our inboxes… or colons. Depends on the individual.

Here’s a picture. Totally unrelated. I’m getting too wordy. *eyes cross* Lucy got “polka bot” jammies for Christamas this year… I got my own last year. She made us wear them together the night she got hers. We took pics. I love how she puts on her best face for pictures:

Continue reading ‘In Which I Save Your 2010: I Did A Cleanse So You Don’t Have To’

It is no secret I am a huge fan of glitter.

No secret.

I love her. Almost as much as my firstborn son.

Almost. *feels shame*

So. Saturday night I got to get outtathehouse. I went to a costume partay.

picture courtesy Mark Gesellman – Photomatopoeia

I actually don’t know what I dressed up as… an over-aged homecoming queen? Glitter herself? Continue reading ‘Make Me Laugh Monday – Glitter Spray for Crafts Finds a Higher Calling’

So. I have this friend. Darcy. A personal trainer. A personal trainer who happens to be my friend who has been cruel kind enough to show me how to properly and effectively work mah boday. She is into “functional training”, and I’m all, “Heh… she said “function”…

Lemme tell ya, the first time she functionally beat the living crap out of me werked her functional magic… I spent lots of time face to rubber with the butt of a Bosu ball. She is a HUGE fan of the bosu ball, thusandtherefore, I have now sucked face with a great number of Bosu balls. Lucky Bosus. I’m kidding.

*not me* but… been there done that.

Wanna cookie?

I digress….
Continue reading ‘My Butt Hurts, You Don’t Even Know.’

I just want to thank you…

A couple of weeks ago I submitted my application in a dream that I might land a gig with Verity Credit Union as their Verity Mom. This gig offers legit pay, a few perks (a laptop, a Flip, and a reason to live) and a tremendous opportunity for my personal professional growth.

I know. I wrote “professional”. Yes, we are all laughing. Jenny + “professional” = Whut the whut?

Continue reading ‘Dear Friends, Thank You!!!’

But first, a video:

Crazy, ehh?

This is a different world for us. For our children. How do we navigate this new social world?

I recently went on a bit of a social media fast. I am still processing what changed for me. Some quick thoughts:

• I feel like I lost ground… in the social media world. I lost some of my grip on the fast moving train, but I don’t feel like I fell off. I am still not back to Twitter like I had been. That could simply be due to the fact that life demands things of me where I simply cannot tend to that area of my interest… of my life.
• I feel like I gained ground. But not much. The laundry was never completely done, the kitchen was never completely cleaned, the kids were never completely satisfied.
• It was not a complete fast. I still had paid gigs to tend to and I simply could not abandon email. Not that I NEED email, but my circle of contacts and friends have come to expect email is as reliable as a phone message. I cannot ignore email.
• I found I missed Facebook. “No kidding” was your first thought, right? I find I missed it for a reason I didn’t expect. I felt left out. Like the kid who was grounded. I felt like I missed out on news and happenings… good news, sad news, writing birthday wishes on walls, jokes, banter… I learned Facebook has become a tool I really rely on to feel connected. That seems obvious, but  this “fast” showed me the extent it has affected my feeling of connectedness.
• Email is still my nemesis.
• It is hard to read all the blogs I desire to read. During this time my passion to try to keep up on other blogs was realized. Now the struggle is finding a system.

But what got me thinking about writing this was a post at Mashable, Facebook Quitters: Find Out When Someone De-Friends You.
Continue reading ‘Personal Thoughts on Using Facebook & Twitter’

Oh snap:

I thought I’d go looking around the YouTube for tips on how to be popular. Because… as a grown 36 year-old woman I need to be looking for tips on how to be popular. Right?

And there you have it. A whole other level of ridiculous. Seriously? Since I found nothing, I feel I should speak up… because I have the “popularity” thing nailed *ahem*… here’s my advice:

• Smile often. Make that your default. But be a good tooth brusher. And flosser.
• Ask people about them. I am a person, so I would consider myself an authority on people. “People” really like to talk about themselves. Create opportunities for people to brag about their own greatness. They will LOVE you. (Warning: you may find you are not so big a fan of that person after all. I once met a guy who said, “I really AM a VERY good guitar player.” Um, never ever heard him play, but really – who the heck would want to? I find I just want to make fun of him… If you find YOU are the one having the opportunity to talk about you… I suggest  you don’t tell people you are a VERY good guitar player, especially if you are old and no one has ever heard of you. I figure if you are old and a “VERY GOOD guitar player” and no one but your buddy and his buddy has heard of you… it is likely you are just old. And delusional. And have a receding hairline. And maybe rent a room to live in from your boss… And smell of pot. That might help explain the delusion… but I digress…)
• Bathe. Regularly.
• Don’t be a Negative Nelly and don’t speak ill of others. Unless you use an old guy who loves how he plays guitar as an example of how not to be popular.
• Own glitter spray. Use it often, but give your public a break.
• Flattery
• Ummm…
• You can’t please everybody, and if someone doesn’t like you, then poo on them!

You know what I think about popularity – POO! Just be nice. Sincere. Interested. Ask questions. Make eye contact. The point is not to be popular… the point is to show people kindness and add to their lives. Being involved in the lives of others should have very little to do about ourselves. It should be about them and how you/me/we are adding quality to their lives. We don’t have to build a fence for them, I’m just talking about the person if front of you in line. A soft smile and a few kind words can go further than one might imagine.

“I got to do what I’m going to do for me” – I HATE that. We are always watching our for ourselves… I argue that if our focus was more external rather than internal, “popularity” wouldn’t be an issue. I argue for “otherness”.

Excuse me. I need to go apply a face mask and brush each section of my hair 100 times. And floss. I need to be pretty so people will like me.

Let’s end on this note. I found the following video at CHEERUPNATION. I suggest you add CHEERUPNATION to your RSS feed.

Untitled from mccabe russell on Vimeo.

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