Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter.

You may be asking yourself, “Self… What is wrong with Jenny on the Spot? Hawt firemen aren’t funny. They’re HAWT. Clowns? Funny. SNL? Funny. A whoopie cushion? Funny. But hawt firemen? Eye candy.”

Whatever.

Read on.

Or not. I’m not the boss of you.

This weekend was the school auction. The one in which I said YES! to a microphone. But what you may not be aware of is I also said YES! to creating a Keynote (Power Point, but with my beloved Mac Awesome). And with that… I took a bit of liberty with communicating the auction *ahem* goods.

Ask forgiveness, not permission… right?

One of the items up for bid was a kid’s birthday party at the local FD. While putting the Keynote together, I told my husband, “Dude. Wouldn’t it be funny if I threw in a hot fireman picture?” He was all, “Dude. You could put it in and pretend like you didn’t know how it got in there.” And the I was all, “SO YOU MEAN I GET TO SIT HERE AND GOOGLE PICTURES OF HAWT, SHIRTLESS FIREMEN???!!!”

Continue reading ‘Make We Laugh Monday – Hawt Firemen’

This is what you asked me yesterday while eating lunch.

I had to answer truthfully, “No, honey. Just because you turn 5 tomorrow doesn’t mean you will be taller.” And because you have an answer or commentary for EVERYTHING and because you will not let no one put they thumb on yo back… you replied, “But I FEEL taller.”
Continue reading ‘Will I Be Taller Tomowwow?’

Who knows what THAT title will bring from the interweb searchers. Aaanywho…

Here’s a cowmonkey on a bullcowdog…

Why a monkey cowboy on a bullcowdog? Because my friend Stacey sent me links to images of Darren Sproles (look him up, I’m tired), and in that email she added a link to this picture. Who does that? STACEY DOES. And I nearly shot sparkling water outta my nose and I just wanted to share the laughter

I’m a giver.

So is she. But this is my blog. ME. This is MY time to shine.

Continue reading ‘A Cowmonkey, a Cowdog, a Stroller and an Auction’

Just to be clear, this is a LIST, not a LISP. In case you read that wrong.

I’m here to help.

My friend Kearsie of Sounds Like Tomatoes and author of the always riveting Adventures with Edward totally tagged me. I figured it’d be good to jump in on the whole “happy” gig. Plus, it involves a list about Me, so how could I pass up an opportunity to write about Me and My happiness? Here’s a fine list of 10 things that make Me happy… in random order… mostly because I never have a plan, so this is pretty much free association… which always goes well in therapy… so why not here?

10 things that make me happy…

1) Awards! It just so happens, @kearsie herself recently bestowed two awards on mine fair temple:

Continue reading ‘Oooh! A List! A List of Happy Things!’

*rubs eyes*

Let’s take a closer look:

Indeed. Looks like the Easter Bunny has taken a hit in this rough economy too. Luckily, SHE (funny, I always thought the Easter Bunny was a “he”) was able to score a mocha/latte/Americano.When I asked her as to why she was chillin’ in a trash can the Easter Bunny had no comment. Snob.

I should cut her some slack. I suppose it’s hard to speak when ones mouth is actually made of stitching.

One never knows what one will get when walking the rough streets of Seattle on a sunny Saturday afternoon in March. And the popular Pioneer Square neighborhood? Obviously a favorite go-to place for our local Easter Bunny.

Speaking of CLEAN…. *clears throat*. I have a sweet little review and giveaway from the clean-makers at Oxiclean going on at my review blog! Head over to learn more and enter for a chance to win a $100 Visa gift card!

JOTS CODE

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Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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Here we are again… Monday. Does anyone else suffer from a case of “the Mondays”. If so… I have cure for your case of The Mondays, and no… it’s not more cowbell.

Tho more cowbell would certainly help. But my prescription to help cure The Mondays is Make We Laugh Monday. Today’s edition?… The keyphrase search terms that bring some folks to my internet home. I will only share the ones that won’t make you gag (well… ). The interwebzzies searchers can be a disturbing bunch.

Here follows my 2 cents on these searches (in bold)… my reply in italics… hyperlinks provide the probable post my searchers went to to get their questions answered.

Continue reading ‘Make WE Laugh Monday – I Give Searchers Answers and Whathaveyou’

My Lucy.

This is not her birthday letter. I still have one more week before my baby turns 5 *gripping chest*.

As hard as it has been to to been the mother of  a baby, toddler and/or a preschooler over the past (nearly) 11 years… I am waving a reluctant goodbye. Lucy was born when Joel was 5 and Olivia was 2 (almost 3)…

The pregnancy of my sweet and spicy Lucy came as a great surprise. And as I sit here thinking back to the morning I peed on that damn stick… I can’t believe the twists and turns life has taken our family… all because of this one little girl.

And here I sit. With one week left of “4″. I am done having babies. I am sure I am fine with that… yet I feel pangs of sadness as I slowly wave goodbye to my identity as a mother of a preschooler. What day will be the last day I will carry her on my hip? When I set her down… will I know that was our last?

Can you hear me sobbing?
Continue reading ‘My Baby is Growing Up! Make Her Stop!’

I have no idea. This is not me. Clearly. No pink stripes in the hair. Otherwise. Mirror much? I kid… I don’t kid.

One day (Wednesday), I ventured to the gym. I am rather committed to the pursuit of fitness… for the next 8 days.

It’s important to have a plan. You see, I am going to be the MC for my kids’ school auction next Friday and since the school auction is going to be all about me, I plan on wearing lots of glitter and a fabulous dress. A fabulous dress – I would like to wear – as opposed to having IT wear ME. Thus, pumping iron and whathaveyou.

Also, I will be overdressed, but word on the street is the Auctioneer is wearing a tux and I simple CANNOT have him outshine me.

Me.

Me.

Me.

IfyaknowwhatImean.

You wanna se my dress? This is the dress. Hold onto your hats.
Continue reading ‘Are You An Aerobics Instructor Here? (Adventures at the Gym)’

Rollin and patrollin in the KC, yo!

*KC – Kitsap County

You are perplexed, no? Perplex no more… The Mom Squad is just your average awesome moms doing regular awesome things in typical awesome ways andwhathaveyou.

Last year, I started writing Mom On The Spot… a reader blog with the Kitsap Sun. I soon realized Mom On The Spot was not the home I had dreamed of making it. As I processed my “dreams” and my limitations I kept coming back to the fact that I didn’t want to do this alone.

Hithertheretofore…. The Mom Squad. 5 local gals, each of us connected by Kevin Bacon to some degree. Our common bonds – motherhood and blogging. Each has a unique voice. Each in a different season of motherhood. Each funny, loving, uniquely dynamic, uniquely creative, and postively gorgeous. You can tell by the picture, huh.

*Pssst* Want to know a secret? The gals in that pic are not the Mom Squad hotties. It’s a pic of me with 4 other friends, but I’m creative and knew no one would know. Except now you do. But we are taking “official” Squad pics soon, so this shot is only the “stand-in” until we can all get together and capture our combined fabulous on film. *flips hair*

Hope we don’t break the camera with our overwhelming charm and gorgeosity.

I’m serious… *deadpan stare*

The Mom Squad — Wendy of Let the Dog In, Lisa of The Blozulfog, Stacey of Oh Happy Days, Michelle of Noggin Toppers, and me.

Check us out.  Check out our Facebook fan page! You don’t have to live in Kitsap County, our awesome is like a really bad virus. Unstoppable. Boundless. Airborne. Yeah… I rock at analogies.

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Keep up on the ridiculous, the insightful, the always digressive…

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I have long been afflicted with a condition called “insecurity”. I was a shy little girl. By high school I found myself in a space I was comfortable in…chubby, but comfortable… and some of the “shyness” began to melt away.

If I look at the big picture of my life, I see pockets of freedom and pockets of shyness. Even in adulthood. Were I a scientist, I might hypothesize that the periods of freedom had a direct correlation to the people I chose to let into my life.

During my perceived “shy” periods, I think I was fearful. I was insecure. I lacked confidence — in who I was or wanted to be. Or my weight held me back. I wavered in my own convictions based on who was around. Acceptance, popularity, inclusion… Familiar much? I think I sought out the wrong people.

But I’m older now. I never thought growing older could be a good thing…

As I have struggled and {to be honest} still struggle with desiring acceptance… life and experience has aged me and I have changed. I have become less guarded, more open, a bit louder, a bit sillier, warmer… free-er… and as a result a bit creative-ier :) My creativity has been given freedom to blossom and in that – I have been given the freedom to live life more fully.

It’s hard though… being able to embrace the freedom I am finding in being be the person I believe God created me to be.  I am self-reflective to a fault. If there is something good about me, I can make that a bad trait. So I search inside looking for faults to work on, not realizing I have been building walls, not actually fixing anything. I have spent years building very thick and high walls that have kept me from being:

Continue reading ‘The Confessional – Insecurity, Freedom and Good Friends’