Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter.

on August 30, 2009

in Fa' Real?, Family, Joel, Lucy, Mom Fail, Mutha' Hood, Not So Much, Olivia, Soccer, Spawn and The Confessional

. 28 Comments

Summer, Fall, Boys, Dogs, Hydration and the Ring of Fire

THIS is called the Ring of Fire. It is a popular carnival ride.

Every time I see the “Ring of Fire” I cringe… even squeeze my legs together a little. As a woman who has given birth, the “Ring of Fire” has a very different meaning to me.

I have survived the Ring of Fire. I have ridden rides similar to the one pictured here. Speaking as an authority on both, the ride pictured here is more deserving of the name “Stupid Dumb Circle Ride That Cannot Even Begin To Compare To The Horror And Utter Pain And Agony OF THE REAL RING OF FIRE”.
Continue reading ‘Summer, Fall, Boys, Dogs, Hydration and the Ring of Fire’

Published

on August 27, 2009

in Facebook, Mom on the Spot, Reviews and Type-A Mom

. 4 Comments

My Little Girls

My girls Don’t let the picture fool ya. All that “primping”… all that pink. Because as soon as they step away from the mirror, one will hear/observe things like I experienced last night while we waited for big brother’s soccer practice to end…

Olivia (7) sat on the grass (criss-cross applesauce-style) while Lucy (4) spun about like the Tazmanian Devil. I had no idea Lucy even had her ears on to involve herself in Olivia’s farty escapade… Surely all her spinning and madness caused her ears to fly off. Not so much.

Olivia shouted for all the parents to hear: “RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!”

Her warning was of no help. For as soon as the “s” in “lives” left her lips… a ground rumbling fart parted the waves of grass across the span of at least 2 soccer fields. Before I even had time to plug my nose or hide from the good soccer moms… Lucy shouted, “FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!!” and ducked for cover behind a pole-thing.

And I stood there. Then I took out my iPhone and sent myself an email about what happened so I wouldn’t forget. And Olivia said, “Are you gonna blog that Mom?” And I was all, “Uhhh… YEAH!” And I also was all, “And by the way… don’t do that again. That’s bad manners.” And then I was all, “I must say that was really funny, girls. But don’t do that again.” And I snorted. And so did Olivia. And then we both snorted again.

By the way, I’ve been hydrating thanks to the Crystal Water Way Challenge… I’ve been doing a pretty good job!

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Published

on August 26, 2009

in Funny Funnerson, Lucy, Olivia, Soccer, Spawn and iPhone

. 5 Comments

I drank 56 ounces of water yesterday.

Day one of water challenge I know. It’s riveting. You can’t look away, can you?

I am taking the Crystal Light Water Way Challenge this week, and writing about how all this water is affecting my bladder body. Look at that picture to the left… I’m all happy and hydrated and celebrating 56 ounces on Day 1!

How much water did you drink usually drink in a day? I wrote about yesterday in greater detail here. But if you’ll excuse me, I need to… well… I need to go potty.

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Published

on August 25, 2009

in Health and Reviews

. 5 Comments

What I Did on My Online Break

[Before I launch into whatever I am about to launch into... Take a peek at my new venture - Jenny On The Spot Reviews! All week I am taking a The Crystal Light Water Way Challenge... Each day I will write about my journey toward good hydration. So far (today), all my organs have taken all the water. My poor shrunken dehydrated organs... Anywho, you can read about it by clicking here and there is an opportunity to win a $1000 Visa gift card. Just read through the post to find out how! See ya there and happy hydration!]

Why don’t we put great big “air quotes” around that “online break” part. I think “Chris Farley” demonstrates it best:

Aren’t you curious what I did with all my extra time? Well, I spent a lot of time on my pot business. I still didn’t get email squared away. You may have noticed new posts here, but those were scheduled… I got a lot of laundry done last Monday. Monday only. I made banana snickerdoodles and the ice cream part of ice cream smores.
Continue reading ‘What I Did on My Online Break’

Published

on August 24, 2009

in Dance, Delusions of Grandeur, Facebook, General, Social Media, The Hubs, The Love, Trippin' and glitter

. 3 Comments

Dancing, It’s My Passion

I am sure you have seen this video. If you have, you know you want to see it again. If you have not, then… OH, you are going to LOVE this. This makes me want to get married again.

And I am pretty sure you have seen the one below *insert delusion of grandeur here*, but since I am a little low on content, and since this video hasn’t gone viral just yet… I’m posting it again:

Speaking of dancing… I’d like to get a crew together and learn this:

Who’s in?

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Published

on August 21, 2009

in General

. 11 Comments

You Must Make These Recipes

You must.

If you read my post on Monday, you know I am “offline” this week. I am hoping that by today I will have made all of the recipes I am suggesting you make. I already made the Banana Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies by Noble Pig a week ago, and they were a HIT! The other Noble Pig cookie recipe I want to try is Banana Snickerdoodles.

I must need potassium because lately I have been BANANAS for bananas!

Before I get to the other 2 recipes I want you to try… 2 recipes I have not yet tried, but plan to this week… I want to show you a picture of my husband and me:

Summer Lovin'

We recently went karaoke-ing – with a live back-up band! Yes – if you look between my hubs and me, you can see some drum… and even part of the bass from a REAL bass playah! We got to sing a duet – “Summer Lovin’”. He was Danny… I was Sandy *lovesick sigh* In addition to this song, I sang “Dancing Queen” with the Blozulfog and Sheila. And I even got the nerve to sing on my own…TWICE… “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” by Pat Benetar and “Material Girl” by Madaonna. For the record, I NAILED that last note of “Material Girl”. NAILED IT. The WHOLE note.

O.K. Food. Have you been to Evil Chef Mom? She rocks. Just like Noble Pig, I have not made one recipe of hers I haven’t liked. These are the 2 recipes I have on tap for this week…. are you ready??? Noble Pig has my cookie fix covered… Evil Chef Mom will meet my ice-cold need: S’more Ice Cream Sandwiches *clutching chest* and Mexican Chocolate Sorbet *melting on the inside* I. Can’t. Wait… to both try these recipes and report back to you!

And if YOU try any of these recipes, let me know! You better believe I’m gonna be wearing my confidence apron!

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Published

on August 20, 2009

in Eats and Fame

. 4 Comments

The Popular Girl

Oh snap:

I thought I’d go looking around the YouTube for tips on how to be popular. Because… as a grown 36 year-old woman I need to be looking for tips on how to be popular. Right?

And there you have it. A whole other level of ridiculous. Seriously? Since I found nothing, I feel I should speak up… because I have the “popularity” thing nailed *ahem*… here’s my advice:

Smile often. Make that your default. But be a good tooth brusher. And flosser.
Ask people about them. I am a person, so I would consider myself an authority on people. “People” really like to talk about themselves. Create opportunities for people to brag about their own greatness. They will LOVE you. (Warning: you may find you are not so big a fan of that person after all. I once met a guy who said, “I really AM a VERY good guitar player.” Um, never ever heard him play, but really – who the heck would want to? I find I just want to make fun of him… If you find YOU are the one having the opportunity to talk about you… I suggest you don’t tell people you are a VERY good guitar player, especially if you are old and no one has ever heard of you. I figure if you are old and a “VERY GOOD guitar player” and no one but your buddy and his buddy has heard of you… it is likely you are just old. And delusional. And have a receding hairline. And maybe rent a room to live in from your boss… And smell of pot. That might help explain the delusion… but I digress…)
Bathe. Regularly.
Don’t be a Negative Nelly and don’t speak ill of others. Unless you use an old guy who loves how he plays guitar as an example of how not to be popular.
Own glitter spray. Use it often, but give your public a break.
Flattery
Ummm…
You can’t please everybody, and if someone doesn’t like you, then poo on them!

You know what I think about popularity – POO! Just be nice. Sincere. Interested. Ask questions. Make eye contact. The point is not to be popular… the point is to show people kindness and add to their lives. Being involved in the lives of others should have very little to do about ourselves. It should be about them and how you/me/we are adding quality to their lives. We don’t have to build a fence for them, I’m just talking about the person if front of you in line. A soft smile and a few kind words can go further than one might imagine.

“I got to do what I’m going to do for me” – I HATE that. We are always watching our for ourselves… I argue that if our focus was more external rather than internal, “popularity” wouldn’t be an issue. I argue for “otherness”.

Excuse me. I need to go apply a face mask and brush each section of my hair 100 times. And floss. I need to be pretty so people will like me.

Let’s end on this note. I found the following video at CHEERUPNATION. I suggest you add CHEERUPNATION to your RSS feed.

Untitled from mccabe russell on Vimeo.

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Published

on August 18, 2009

in Delusions of Grandeur, Fa' Real?, Friends and General

. 8 Comments

I Am Going Offline

For a week.

But before I launch into that, I need to announce the winner of my Rock of Ages soundtrack CD giveaway… and the winner is…….. Kim — #4!!!! as chosen by the integer generator at RANDOM.ORG:

#4 is the winner!

Yay Kim!!! Congratulations! I’ll drop you and email, you cute little winner, you!

Back to my offline-ness. I am going to go mostly offline for the next week. I am finding I need to take some time to reorganize, reprioritize, fall-back, regroup, take a break… basically take a little time to step back, pull my head out of the water, wipe my eyes and see where I’m at.

Given the state of the world as it is, I will need to check email. However, I will be looking at it minimally, only tending to fires and purging. I will have my cell phone, and will allow texting. However, I will not be Facebooking, Tweeting, Whrrling, Blipping, surfing, blog posting (have a couple of scheduled posts to keep the cobwebs at bay), blog reading, “researching”… yadda, yadda, yadda.

It will be an adjustment for sure, but I am excited. I am excited to tend to some things I realize I have allowed to fall to the side. I am excited to take this time to take a deep breath and make some decisions… Do I need to learn better balance, or do I need to cut some things? I just feel I need to be away for a bit to be able to take clear look. What do I want? What do I need? What kind of wife, mother, friend am I today? What kind of wife, mother, friend do I want to be? And most importantly — what kind of wife, mother and friend do my loved ones need?

I doubt this will be life-changing, but I hope good changes will come out of this time. I have recipes to try, places in my home to organize, a floaty-thing in the pool to float on, extra exercising to do because my hub’s 20 year class reunion is VERY soon and I have something to prove (kidding, not kidding, kidding… not…)… a puppy to train, and I have a job I have recently taken on and I have lots of phone calls to make… I may even steal a nap or two…

Yadda, yadda, yadda… I just feel all off-kilter and I think my little laptop is tired of me too.

You all have a wonderful week! Feel free to leave a comment… I love your comments! It’ll just be a few days before I get to them! Smiles and hugs. Pray for me… for the withdrawals to be painless, for progress, and perhaps some great ideas on balance. O.K., o.k., o.k., o.k. … I’m off. Peace.

Feet in the Indianola sand

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Published

on August 17, 2009

in General

. 8 Comments

Safety!

This is what my kids yell after they fart. For if they are caught farting and do not shout “safety” the hearer/smeller of the fart yells “doorknob” and the fater must go touch a doorknob.

This is commonplace in our home.

Doesn’t matter if no one heard the fart. You’ll know it within moments. Like today… we were at the park. The youngest started to make her way to the playset. She was WAY out of fart-hearing distance. She looked over at me. I thought she thought I thought she walked too far from me, and was looking at me to see if I’d call her back.

Nope.

She looked at me… head cocked, with a bit of a smirk…

Safety!

Half-yelled, but never missed a step… “SAFETY!”

Good thing she said that, cuz it’s hard to find a doorknob at the park. Had I hear that fart… I TOTALLY would have made her find a doorknob. No mercy.

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