Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter.

This post is for those of you who have been bearing with me as I go on and on about some “marathon” I have been training for… for the past 18 weeks. Only 18 weeks.

WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! 

Goshgollydoggoneitalltoheckalmightyofthewholeworld.

Did you see that? I totally just made spell check wig-out. Kinda like I made my Achilles tendon wig-out on my 20 mile run a few weeks ago. Yeah. Like that. Garrrr.

I went on a run today – my last before “the event”. It did not go very well, and for this I am highly discouraged and want to bake a cake so I can sit on mah butt whilst I ice mah lame leg and eat the entire cake while I pout and whine and feel all kinds of sorry for my mostly-trained-for-but-am-now-injured-but-not-gonna-give-up-on-that-marathon-dream-self. 

You see, I am broken and the best part of the training plan was the last 3 weeks. I survived the most hideous part to be rewarded with suckness. Yes, “suckness” is a word.

Because I said it’s a word.

There are other words too, but… *physically holding tongue*

I’m sorry. I know My Public depends on me for humor. OK. I hear you callin’ me out…*puts her big girl pants on*

Here is a short video my friend Jill posted on her Facebook. I “met” Jill via Lisa. BTW, Lisa, it’s time for a new post! I “met” Lisa some years ago via our blogness because we were both training for half-marathons and… Lisa and I then connected on Facebook, and then Jill and I caught one another’s “eye” as we loved all over Lisa over on her Wall… and… a friendship was born. You’re tearing up, aren’t you? OK, so I have “met” neither Lisa nor Jill in the technical sense of “meeting”…  but I adore both girls like I adore all shiny things. And when I say, “I have been chatting online with hot chicks…” I am probably talking about Jill and Lisa. 

Where was I? Ah yes… the video from Jill. Made me giggle. It’s really clean, really! And that’s why it’s so stinkin’ hilarious…

Now off with yo bad selves. Have a great day and don’t forget to feel sorry for me. Maybe even spritz some glitterspray on your wrists in an act of solidarity. Have I told you how much I love you lately..? *wipes tear*

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A little bit of this: An insider look… this Jenny on drugs blogging:

Sure… it LOOKS like I’m thinking, but… prolly not so much. 

A little bit of that: My son… He’s 9 and I have no idea how I became the mother of a nine year boy. I have been in “baby/toddler/preschooler” mode  since he was born and at 4 years old, my daughter Lucy still has me in the thick of battle. But I am finding I really need to shift gears. My son is 9 and is not so much the ultra-dependent little person he once was. NOW, girls are flirting with him. Oy:

… I took my daughter to play practice this afternoon. (GO Kitsap Children’s Musical Theater!!!) Olivia wandered in while I stayed in the car with my 4 year old daughter and 9 year old son. Within minutes I felt as if my hawt little minivan was a bloody carcass being circled by hungry sharks…. No, it was worse! A gaggle of giggling elementary girls circled my van when they discovered my son was safe inside. 

You can read the entire expose’ at my Mom on the Spot blog over there at the Kitsap Sun…
Continue reading ‘A little bit of this, a little bit of that…’

Um… betcha didn’t know I was the head-double for Cousin Itt…

(Photo courtesy of Mark Gsellman)

Continue reading ‘I really do love to dance…’

 A brief conversation… between me and a total stranger… made me laugh recently. I probably need to set the scene: A local bistro. “Retro night”. Disco ball. Dancing. Lisa. Me. A couple other gals. Our adoring Public.

Over time, I have developed a friendship with the DJ and his darling girlfriend. I know, you are surprised. I am so off-putting. But, you just can’t fight love, and my DJ and his darling love me. I had them at glitter… Aaaanywhos… A few weeks ago there was a serious boogie need, so we headed to the bistro over there to get a bit of a groove on. For the record, it was the same day as my 18 mile run, but I am insane and could not resist the call of the wild groove. It’s an illness. Obviously. 

So, we wuz hangin’ with our homies… sharin’ time between the dance floor and kickin’ it fa’ realz up in our “VIP spot” by the the DJ. *delusion of grandeur in full-swing right about now*… I was exiting the dance floor… heading back to my “VIP spot” to catch a breath and re-hydrate. As I walked by, a man tapped my arm:

Man: Excuse me…

Me: Whu? Um… yes?

Man: I’m sorry, but, may I ask you a question?

Me (disoriented because I think I had just finished doing the Roger Rabbit & a shard of glitter may have been lodge in my left cornea): Uh……. ……… …….. yeah…

Man: Do you work here?

My head: Uh… does he want me to get him a drink? Maybe I could get a tip. *light-bulb moment*

Me: Do I work here?! Nnnnnnnneeeeeoooooooooo… *cocked my head crosswise and all* Why???

Man: Oh, I’m sorry. It just… You… You just really get the crowd going out there.

Me: Oh, wow! THANK YOU! 

I bowed curtsied limped away (remember: 18 mile run + Roger Rabbit + heels = peg-leg swagga), feeling a bit ashamed proud and tripped up the stairs to get back to my VIP table. And no. There wasn’t a pole. I’m not that kind of girl. It’s not that kind of place. 

Aaaaand scene. *clack*

But it makes me wonder… I could use some extra cash… I just don’t… How would I explain a job like that… to my preschool mommy friends… my pastor… my own mother?! “Yeah! I got this great job at the martini bar! I work evenings! I get paid to dance. I work the room. I am an entertainer at a local “establishment”. I am a facilitator of adult fun. I am a dance floor encourager!” Yeah. That’s the ticket.

If you have something funny to share -please do! Add your name and the link to your specific funny post below: Uh…Scratch that. I can’t get Mr. Linky to work… if you have a funny to share, link to it in the comments and if I can get Mr. Liny figured out, I’ll plug ya in when/if I have success…

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On Tuesday – my friend Jen Singer popped in to introduce herself and her newest book — Stop Second Guessing Yourself: The Toddler Years… and, Jen, the wonderful human being that she is, generously offered a copy of this book as a giveaway here! Today I announce the WINNAH.

***I think we all need to start spelling “winner” as “winnah”. It packs a certain punch, don’t it? Also… I think I am going to start spelling “shizzle” with a “C” —  SCHIZZLE. My friend’s husband – from Norway – texted her the other day and wrote, “You are the SCHIZZLE”. I was all, “He is SOOOOO European!” So, in an attempt to be more “globally minded” I will now spell “shizzle” with a C.***

But, you want to know who won! Watch:

Yay! Kathleen of Forging Ahead! SCHIZZLE!!! The rest of the giveaway entrants – thank you for putting your name in! I wish everyone could have won! 

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In other news… My local paper (The Kitsap Sun) decided to allow me a little blog-space in their reader blog section! I know… they have no idea… Guess what I named it, because creativity is the blood that flows through my vains veins… 

Mom on the Spot

If you subscribe to that feed, they’ll think I’m popular. *hinthint*

I! Know! Brilliance that shines like glitter… Mom on the Spot. Why am I not working for an ad agency. Sheesh. Untapped… Aaanywho…

Over there I will be writing about adventures in motherhood, but with a local twist. I get to document not only random things about motherhood, but will get to write about my community here in Kitsap County. I hope to share about upcoming family-friend events, “report” on how MY family enjoys local events (I hear you snickering…), and I hope other moms and families will share ideas on how I can reach beyond my own realm of familiarity. I have small kids, but I hope to be able to go beyond my “little world” and bring in all stages of local moms and families. 

For my first post, I introduced myself, “Who is this “Mom on the Spot”, Anyway?“ And in my second post, just yesterday, I wrote about how an afternoon at one of local parks panned out for a mom such as myself…

*takes deep breath* Just wanted to share that with you-all here, cuz you love me and I love you and it’s fun to share good news with friends :) Alright – now. Ya’ll have a fabulous and lovely weekend… M’kay?

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OK, so I don’t have 91 other ego-boost tips. I just started with #92 because it possesses an air of “experience”. Plus, if I put #1, then you’ll think the following tip is NUMERO UNO of all ego-boosting tips. Since I have never done this before, I have no idea what the best tip would be. SO. I chose #92. So there.

As a mother of three who is in the upper-mid 30’s age-range… Mah ego gets more of a lickin’ than a boost. Hey, my youngest is 4 and holds nothing back. 

Ego-Boost Tip #92: Color a select few strips of your hair red/pink…

then go have lunch with your daughter’s first grade class… Sit at a table with 7-10 impressionable 6-7 year old girls and Let. Your. Ego. Boost! In other words: Create a visual distraction. The brighter the better. 

You may overhear hear things like: 

Your mom is so pretty…

I know… she’s pretty like your mom…

Or you might have compliments directed AT you: 

Miss Jenny… I love the pink in your hair.

Your hair is so pretty.

I really like your hair.

You are really pretty Miss Jenny.

{{{pink, pink,  pink, hair, hair, hair, pretty, pretty, pretty}}}

As we sat at the elementary lunch table, with my knees to my chin… I finally had my day. You know… *cue dream sequence*

You’re 36 16 and you walk into the school cafeteria. You move in slow motion (even your hair), because you are so awesome… so awesome even time and space to take a second look. You flip your hair off your shoulder… you spy an admirer and cast a gentle smile his way. Your teeth are so white there is an actual sparkle *ding*. You wink. You saunter to a table and not unlike the Red Sea in the Biblical days, all the girls at the table make room for you. Yes, YOU. Lovely, vibrant, gorgeous… YOU… Everyone is smiling…whispering… a song starts… and….

*screech*

Whu? Oh. Aaaaanywho. I had a ball at lunch with Olivia and her classmates. They loved the pink, but I wasn’t the focus. OK, I was, but it wasn’t all about my hair… I spent a GREAT deal of time guessing everybody’s numbers on their milk cartons and catching up on their favorite subjects. Next week, maybe I’ll wear my red sequined Converse. Oh, I hope my new pals love my shoes! {giggling}

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In case you are interested… I have a new post up at Type-A Mom: How the Heck Does a Mom Relax Anyway?

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So. Mommas… mommas of toddlers, to be specific… Do you do that? Do you second-guess yourself as you plod, run, weave and crawl your way through parenting a toddler? I know I did… each time. Sure, by child #3 I had loosened-up a tad or maybe I just gave-in, but the jury is still out :)

And for this, I say “Gloray!” for women like Jen Singer of MommaSaid. She has lived through the toddler years (2 boys!) and came out on the other side unscathed with a book filled with ideas that are not just ideas, but field-tested strategies. She probably even still has bruises on her maternal knees to prove it. Or not. But that sounded so impressive, didn’t it?

Jen Singer is a witty writer who peppers helpful tips and advice with humor and even tugs at those heart strings from time to time. I read her first book, You’re a Good Mom (and Your Kids Aren’t So Bad Either) and couldn’t stop sharing her insights with friends and random mothers who had the misfortune luck of crossing my “I want to talk to adults, can I talk at you will you please talk to me?” path. 

I know… You are probably saying to yourself, “Sure, Jenny… blah, blah, blah… Say what you will… I don’t know this “Jen Singer”. Who is she? Why should I trust HER?” 
Continue reading ‘Stop Second Guessing Yourself: The Toddler Years by Jen Singer’

 Can’t do it today. But if you have something, I’ll put Mr.Linky at the bottom. I didn’t get something put together ahead of time… and it’s a glorious day outside  and I want to be out there and not on my computer… and my kids are a breath away from maiming each other. And because of that last part I feel really PO’d and want to run far, far away. Agh! 

But please return tomorrow? *cocks head to the right* I’ll put on my pretty voice. The lovely Jen Singer of MommaSaid will stopping by for her blog book tour. Also, she will be giving away one copy of her new book: Stop Second Guessing Yourself: The Toddler Years. I have been an admirer of Jen for a great number of years. She was one of the first blog folks I started reading. She has been a rudder in my own direction as a writer as I have tried to figure out the tone of my own “voice”. She may not want to associated with me on that level, but… Also, he name is made out of Awesome. I have always liked her name… Aaaanywho… She is so gifted in sharing about her journey in motherhood with humor and wisdom. I feel I am doing alright on the “funny”, but still need to get in on that “wisdom” part ;) 

Speaking of influence, have you heard of Please Take My Children to Work Day? Jen came up with that. After a morning like this one… I think, “Why haven’t I become a champion of that holiday?” June 29, 2009 is Please Take My Children To Work Day. Kinda thinkin’ I need to write a letter to my congressperson. This outta be a law. Seriously. If you could be in my home right now, you’d be handing me a white jacket and a free ticket to a quiet room. And a bottle of the good stuff.

I could go on about Jen Singer, but I’ll save the rest for tomorrow! And also, did I mention – BOOK GIVEAWAY???

OK, one funny link – I was introduced to an H to the ILARIOUS website by Mona of Kirida… It’s called, My First Dictionary. It’s funny. Really.

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As you all may know (or if you don’t I’m about to tell you)… I have been training to run a full marathon. I started an 18 week training plan almost 16 weeks ago.

*pats self on the back*

Wanna know what happened? Tendinitis. More specifically, Achilles tendinitis. Good times. Not severe, but if I’m not careful… the word “screwed” comes to mind.

Last week I had my longest training run – 20 miles. My running partner/dear friend Katie and I started the run in good spirits. We ran. And ran. And ran. And ran. And ran. And ran. And ran. At mile 10 we turned around to hit the second half and… Yowza! Owie! Yikes! Zoink! I felt a sharp pain in my ankle “area”.

But we still had 10 miles to go and it was a full weekend… I did not have time to NOT finish the last 10. So I did what any Smarty Smarterson would do… I ran until the sharp pain “dulled” and I prolly looked like a gimpy girl-like Hunchback of my local community. OK, it wasn’t that bad, but by the time the last 10 was through the sharp pain in my left ankle radiated up to my calf and my right knee was feeling a bit snippy.

Overcompensation, anyone?
Continue reading ‘I Have Tendinitis and My Marathon is in 15 Days.’

I confess. I’m a drooler. Literally and figuratively. But I am most ashamed of the “literal” aspect of this.

I “drool” (figurative) over pretty things and delicious chocolates. I appreciate a fine article of clothing, a lovely piece of jewelry, choice modes of transportation and all types of shiny things. Even a well polished sea-stone might turn on this “figurative” drool… ooh shiny… I *might* even drool over certain LOST characters. But I don’t. Really… I…

But I do have a drooling problem. I do. Not generally as I am lallering and such in public, tho having brace does cause me to reassess that claim. I wouldn’t call THAT problem “drooly”. I would call THAT “slurpy”, which are 2 VERY different afflictions. I digress.
Continue reading ‘The Confessional: Drool’