So, not too long ago, my girl Lisa surprised the socks off me. She got me a REAL LIFE tambourine!!! But not just ANY tambourine… the tambourine of my dreams — one of those half-circle ones for people like me who definitely can keep a beat, but one who also gets off beat because as Awesome as I know I am… I am not perfect. I tend to get a teeny bit distracted and it is a little hard to howl sing and keep rhythm AND shake one’s booty. It’s just not as easy as it looks, people…
Now, I have owned one of those full-circle tamb’s with the skin. Oh yeah. And as much as I long to have the righteous skilzz to be able to work the skin on a full-circle tambourine… I do not have that skill *feels heart tear a little*. The ability to work a full-circle-skinned tambourine is a gift I have not been given.
I went to a church once. And there was this woman. She had the rhythm and hands of an Angel. I have never seen anything like what I saw that glorious Sunday mornin’. I looked on YouTube to find you a video. Everyone should experience such talent…. alas, YouTube had nothing even remotely close…
What I saw that one Sunday morning came straight from the gates of heaven and I want to be that lady’s best friend. What she possesses — is an innate skill… one that cannot be taught. One who knows how to fully jam on a full circle, skinned tamb… is one I hold in complete awe, and one who I believe will be leading the Saints as they go marchin’ in. I know this without a doubt. You should have seen her. I’d choose her over glitter… and that’s big.
Because I am a reasonable woman, who will not give-up on her dream of rockin’ the tambourine, I have accepted my skillful limits. I will rock the half-circle tambourine. And being the committed friend that she is, Lisa saw a hole in my dream… She believed in me. She also believed air-tambouine was not helping me get very far in my tambourine dreams. Therehithertohenceforth… my electric blue tambourine!
There is an end to this.
Names. Lisa and I have come up with a few pet names for my new toy/interest/future career tool… I want to share them with you! Lisa came up with the first three. Her great ideas makes me curious… Can YOU think of any names for my new tambourine???
- Glambourine (like, of course!!!)
- Damnbourine (for those angry days)
- Shazambourine (when those jeans fit just right)
- Manbourine (when you need to take out your frustrations on a not-male-human)
- Mambourine (I have no idea)
- Spambourine (because it’s cheesy… not “Spam”, but the name. Spam is canned ham, btw…)
- Pambourine (for when anyone named “Pam” wants to play it)
- Scambourine (for when I play it on the streets for money)
- Nambourine (for war vets)
- KaBlam!bourine (for the time you have a home-invasion-robbery and you can’t find the billy club you keep under your bed… You use your KaBlam!bourine – because you know you keep it under your pillow!)
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I love a challenge!
Swambourine – for when you are jamming in the pool. Or if your basement floods, and you want to sing your blues away.
Sambourine – in case my son, Sam, comes by to rock it out with you.
Lambourine – what you play at Passover.
MiaHammbourine – for playing at soccer games.
Flimflambourine – just because I think the word “flimflam” is silly
Oh Jenn – You absolutely slayed me! SLAYED ME!!!!!
When you’re playing for the kids, you might use your:
- Sam I Ambourine
- While eating Green Eggs And Hambourine
- or when reading Good Night Moonbourine
Accompaniment for:
- the Tune-n-Lubourine appointment
- putting another load in the Washing Machinebourine
- or posting a quick update on Facebourine
ThisAin’tBourine
(Kindof like this ain’t boring- with a twist:)
Panbourine…..for those days when you need to rock out a fry some bacon in a pan at the same time….mmmmm BACON
Lambourine if you want to play in my daughter’s band. ;)
Iron Manbourine! For when you are rockin’ the triathlete training! Woot! I actually thought of one!
Yes We Canbourine (inspired by yesterday’s inauguration) :)
I’ll just stand in the front row of your next concert as you play the Fanbourine. I see a video coming in the near future featuring your new appendage!
Ok..
Rambourine… no its not naughty if you like it, you know.. the animal.
Obambourine.. another presidentially inspired one.
WhamBamIamaManbourine… when you are feeling like a white 80’s music star givin rap a go.
Blambourine.. when de frijoles are helping you to makes your musica no?
I loved your Nambourine. That rocks. Totally.
How about Jambourine – for when you play while enjoying a tasty piece of toast or an English muffin with some jam?
i say you name it Al Sharpton, who else has a tam named Al Sharpton?
shakeyourgroovethingbourine
ok, perhaps that’s a little long
maybe bluebourine?
I like Dumblond’s suggestion…she’s so very clever!
I thought of Jambourine (who doesn’t love a jam session now and again?!) too, but then read the comments and saw FADKOG beat me to it! Great minds . . .
Mambourine says Mamogram to me, LOL! Maybe you can take it in next time you get a check up?! haha
Please, can you PM me and tell me few more thinks about this, I am really fan of your blog…