Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter.

Hey you… Yeah you — sipping on your coffee/eating a muffin/scratching your head/twiddling your thumbs… Come here… A little closer… A little closer… I have a secret. You’re not going to tell anyone are you? Thank you. I really need to get this off my chest and I need to be able to trust you with my secret.

I love glitter.

I love glitter.

Love. Her.

I even wrote a Haiku about her:

Shiny. Sparkly. Joy.

Reflecting bright rays of light.

Celebrate Glitter.

I was at one of those “craft stores” yesterday. I cringe thinking about it. I truly feel out of my element near any craft-type stuffs anymore. Don’t get me wrong — I CAN craft… I HAVE crafted, but all the “gear” upsets my psyche and makes me want to pull my hair out. More “stuff” is the opposite of what I need in my life.

Unless the “stuff” is glitter… Oooh, shiny…

I happened upon a scrapbooking paper pack at that store yesterday. But not just ANY paper pack – a GLITTER paper pack. I gasped – out loud. Be still my not-gonna-get-crafty-anytime-soon-heart. Oh the colors of glitter I saw! Oh the charming designs only made charming-er by…. GLITTER! Kudos to me though, I didn’t buy it. I am a picture of control.

Aaaanywhoooo… The best part of my relationship with glitter is the part where I wear it. I have no idea how many cans of glitter spray I own. It’s almost as if a layer of glitter helps me hide… a “security blanket” of sorts, if you will. It is as if when the glitter is on… So. Am. I. The sparkly tiny squares of reflectivity help deflect the insecurities of a gal who… probably loves glitter so much because… it is a really good choice of accessory for… a gal with adult-onset ADHD. So many points of light!

My Public is starting to recognize this about me. The glitter, not the ADHD… Not too long ago, when I was at a local street dance with my family — an acquaintance/friend inquired, “What? No glitter?!”

Truthfully, I think it’s a confidence issue — and what do all confidence issues require??? PROPS! It seems glitter has become my “general use” confidence prop.

May I give you a challenge? An assignment? Next time you meet someone wearing glitter – observe how your interaction with them goes. Better yet, glitter spray is CHEAP people! Give your hair and arms a spritz or 2 or 3 and test Your Public… I think the presence of glitter breaks down walls and brings people together. There is a certain level of fascination about what kind of person would do such a thing. True, it may frighten some (probably mostly Vampires because of their “issues” with light), but I believe most come around … because secretly…

Everyone loves glitter.

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Yesterday I wrote a post about my son. My original intent was to copy and paste the email praising my wonderful son. However, as I thought about it – the email meant so much more because of the journey my son and I have made. At one point I wrote about “… the light in the middle of the tunnel.”

Today the focus shifts to Lucy… my darling 3-year-old daughter – with whom I share a very dark tunnel at the moment. Don’t get me wrong – I can see points of light… when she lets me just hold her, when she thanks me for cleaning her up because she had an accident, her genuine excitement over the smallest thrills (like hot cocoa with mom at the coffee shop), her smile, and the way she looks when she’s sleeping — so deceptively peaceful. That whole “sleep look” is not unlike a well-camouflaged bear trap. One has no idea what lies beneath…

Mothering Lucy has been different than Joel. I was able to get her to sleep in reasonable increments as a newborn, and by 9 months she was sleeping through the night. This was vital to the well-being of the entire family. She is child #3, so her ability to sleep through noises only generated by the bowels of hell is impressive. Similarly, her ability to replicate sounds only generated by the terrorized souls of hell is unnerving. Sometimes I’d swear only dogs can hear her.

While Lucy was pretty easy in her infancy (a comparative, here), she is making up for it as a toddler, now preschooler. HolyOhMyHeck. My stresses with Joel were physical – keeping him away from sharp objects, out of traffic, other people’s comfort zones… I remember lots of sweating as I followed my busy, curious little boy from shiny object to sharp object to moving train.

With Lucy – it’s emotional. She is becoming a master of emotional terrorism, and I am the diplomat who is supposed to bring her back to reality. ??? Like I am in any state of mind to keep others grounded. *falls on floor laughing at the irony*

My husband and I are starting to see the stranglehold she has on each one of us. Both Joel and Olivia will give over their most prized possession just to get her to shut-up. Last night, on our way home from soccer practice, Joel said, “Mom… I don’t want to go home. Lucy will be cranky. She’s always cranky at night.”

He’s right. And who has allowed her to “run the show”. Yours Truly *hangs head in shame*. It’s been my job to help Lucy learn how to communicate without using terrorist tactics. It has been my job to protect the other two from having to give into the tiny person who rules with an iron fist – or vocal chords which hit such decibels one’s skin just curls off all on it’s own. If WE don’t want to hear it, our skin most certainly does not!

In my defense, it’s not that I don’t try. I try every day. E.V.E.R.Y. D.A.Y. I give her choices, positive consequences, negative consequences, praises, time-outs… The problem is she kinda doesn’t care. She’s kind of like those dinosaurs on Jurassic Park who tested every area of the fence until they found the weak section. That’s mah Lucy!

But… here is where I have hope and think I can make it 5 or 6 years until I get to the middle of the tunnel. I remember that Joel kinda didn’t care about consequences at that age either. Lucy’s socks drive her bat-shit crazy too – just like Joel! There are little things I see in her that I remember seeing in Joel. I know that they are not the same people, but I am suspecting there are some personality traits they share. It has me thinking that she struggles with deep feelings that she cannot yet express… with Joel that translated into physical outbursts… with Lucy she turns to emotional outbursts and emotional manipulation. 

I’ll finish with a happy note — with one of my most treasured memories that Lucy and I share almost daily… holding hands. But when we do, she often says, “Too tight Mom… too tight.” Which means she wants me to hold her hand tighter, which means despite my shortcomings and failures, she still trusts her mom. 

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I can’t remember if I have written about how difficult it was mothering my son, my first when he was a baby/toddler/preschooler… I want to share this because this is a story I would have wanted to hear 7 years ago. I write this because today, I see the light in the middle of the tunnel. My son is 9, not 19 – so we are still in the middle. But… there is light, and for this I am overwhelmed with gratitude and joy.

First off, before I had children I was the ideal parent. Aaaaand I was so full of crap. I had no idea. I had no idea. I had no idea. But I had taken Child Psychology and Child Development in college… which made me even more full of crap when it came to parenting prior to actually parentING. Oh Jenny and her ideals…. and her text-book answers that made so much sense…

Cue scene which revealed my pre-child “full-of-crap”ness: Continue reading ‘My son… how far we’ve come…’

“Exhaustive??? Why???” 

• It was exhausting. You’ll see why.
• I suffer from a condition called “Self-Importance”, and symptoms of that very painful condition include (but are not limited to) the use of too many words in blog posts, multiple references to oneself, and the capitalization of words such as “Me” or “My”. I exhaust Myself just having to deal with Me. 
• Lisa’s husband Mark took lots of pictures, and who am I to withhold such talent from My Public?
• It’s My blog, that’s why.
• I just wanted there to be one more bullet. Multiple bullet-points look important and validate My feelings about Myself.

The first picture is of Lisa and Me. I recently declared Myself the President of The Dance Party. Lisa graciously took the position as my VP. The girl represents! One look at the following picture, and there is no arguing that we truly deserve to be the Prez & V.P. of… The Dance Party. We hold nothing back. No. Thing. I mean – she’s not even touching the ground, and somehow I managed to NOT put my own eye out!

I’m sorry. Every time I look at this picture I nearly pee My pants. Excuse me. I’ll get back to this post in a minute… 

Alright. *scoots chair back in* Continue reading ‘An exhaustive account of the 20th anniversary of My 16th birthday.’

I have a BIG post planned for later today… coverage of the big birthday bash, but I have a few things I need to get out of my brain. I should probably save this for tomorrow, but it looks like I’ve decided against that!

Speaking of deciding… I splurged today and bought an eggnog latte. In my defense it is “Two for Tuesday”, so I actually bought my husband a coffee and mine was free! See how frugal I am! While waiting for my hot cuppa goodness, I was faced with a decision:

I wish we could vote with gumballs on election day. I think everyone would feel a bit brighter…

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In other news – if you were to visit 5×5 Project today you might get a little frightened! I took on the “Boo” theme and submitted my picture to Krysta… I have titled the picture, “Boo” says the Harvest Moon from behind the evergreens. Thank you, Krysta for providing another opportunity for me stretch and reach!

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Did you know that today is my birthday? Of course you did. Why would you already know it’s my birthday? Probably because I just can’t shut-up about it. Why would a woman who has officially secured herself a spot in the “latter 30’s” keep talking about her birthday – henceforth reminding people that she is in fact – not getting any younger? Not sure. Dementia, perhaps? Desperate for attention, perhaps? Perhaps.

But all that silliness does not, in fact, make me laugh (o.k., maybe a little). Probably the “things” that make me laugh the most are my friends… So, today, in celebration of My Birth, I want to link to friends who make me laugh… friends who make me smile… My blog friends… many of whom I have never met in real life — which means many of my “in real life” friends get a little weirded out when I tell stories about my online friends.

Uh. Mah. Gah! Today my friend “So&So” wrote the funniest thing! You know, “So&So”… She has a blog. Oh… Uh… the one who’s tag line is… Uh… I met her onli… Well, one time she left this comment that… No. We’ve never met. But… but… we’re friends… really. Oh. Nevermind…

These friends are the folks who endanger the well-being of my laptop when I decide to load their RSS feed and take a drink of coffee at the same time. They are the ones who leave the comments — and thus make my day. Comments that encourage and comments that have me wishing I wore Depends. They are the friends who sharpen my style and drive me to keep writing… because they humor Me… they give me kudos for just being Me, and lather Me with awards for which I am not worthy *butIam*, and they have had the same conversations as I wrote above with their own “in real life” friends. In short, we “get” each other in ways normal people don’t “get” us.

The following is in random order… and is not in any way “complete”. I have a few awards to claim, and thus hand out in coming posts, so if you are not included here it is more a reflection of my bent toward disorganization – OR it could be I have a better fit for you in one of those later posts! *Big Hug*

* Lisa of The Blozulfog. She is actually an “IRL” friend who I managed to bring to the dark side. If anyone makes me laugh, it’s Lisa. Everyone should have a “Lisa”. 

* Kathleen of Forging Ahead. I met Kathleen in July at BlogHer… and we were immediate friends. Kathleen has been a consistent encourager in my event training and life struggles… and has faithfully posted here for Make Me Laugh Monday. Her MMLM post last week absolutely slayed me!

* D… of My Life is Based on a True Story. There’s something about this lady. I just know if we were to ever meet, it’d be like, “Have we always been friends?” When I see “D…” in my comments, I can’t help but smile. You must read this post about her son who recent ran – AND won the position of treasurer at school. When I run for Treasurer of the World, I’m gonna hire him to manage my campaign! And D… I’ll let you wear A “Vote for Jenny” tshirt. I’m O.K. with playing dirty.

* Bubba’s Sis of Mother, Daughter, Sister, friend… Me. She just posted pictures of herself in her cheer uniform. I love a woman who is as nuts as me. She is currently logging her and D…’s journey on The Amazing Race. I love her mind.

* Jen of Preschoolers, Toddlers, newborns, Oh My! I have known her pretty much since my mind started allowing me to keep memories. She has made me laugh for years… especially the time she rode her bike into a parked car… and she still leaves me laughing when she writes like this.

* Casey of Goods Forever. Casey started her blog when she moved away from me. That did not make me laugh. BUT when she surprised me by coming to my birthday party – that also did not make me laugh. I cried! What DID make me laugh was all the fabulous fun I had dancing with her Friday night. She was the other cheerleader at my party. Casey always makes me laugh… and she has the most adorable dimples!

* Rhi of Rhi in Pink. She writes funny letters, and sometimes refers to herself as “Lupron Rhi” and blogs about her coming birthday, just like I do! I love people with multiple personalities! Maybe that is why I love myself so much. I had been reading her blog for sometime before going to BlogHer in July. Then… one night.. I met her–IN PERSON– *clouds part* as I was sauntering out of a swanky bar in San Francisco – heading to find more city to overtake with my charm and childlessness. As I was leaving I heard, “It that Jennyonthespot?” People, there is nothing quite as exciting as someone calling you by your blog name. *wipes tear… looks for someone to roll out a red carpet for her to walk upon*

*JD of I Do Things… So You Don’t have To. She just cracks me up. She does things like buys stuff online – so we don’t have to…

* Dawn at Because I Said So. She is just plain funny. A girl HAS to have a sense of humor when she has 6 kids! I have read her blog for a long, long time… I believe she was one of the firsts… I seldom commented because she was just so popular, and, like who was I to speak into her world? Then, in July – again, at BlogHer I met her and I was all, “I love your blog but I never comment because you’re so popular!” Dawn, did I totally make a fool out of myself? If I did, I guess I was just bein’ true to myself! In my defense,  I was star-struck and didn’t expect the common-folk to have access to the important people :) 

* Jenny of Absolutely Bananas. Jenny doesn’t live far from me, and we were both at BlogHer, but we still have not met. This must change. Jenny’s sense of humor is a magnet for me… She started MMLM, and has allowed me to continue with it. I sure hope to meet her before she becomes convinced I am stalking her… before she has time to obtain a restraining order…

I could continue, but time is slipping way and while this is Make me Laugh Monday, I am actually writing this on Sunday night. I gotsta get my butt in bed if I plan to get in a bright and early work-out. 

It’s your turn to bring on the laughter! Plug your info into the Mr. Linky below… leave a comment. Feel free to use the MMLM image at the top of this post in your post! If your MMLM video or audio clip is edgy, kindly give a heads-up for those who may be sporting a kidlet on one’s hip whilst blog-hopping. Thanks, peace, and all the good stuff! Yay Monday!

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Because I am almost 36 (tomorrow!) and I danced like a fool at my party, I am a very tired girl. I woke up to aching feet, a tense tushie, crampy leg and thigh muscles, I think my heel was broken for the first 2 hours I was awake, and my knees were clicking louder than normal. 

“I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”

Kidding. I’m not kidding. But I am… butI’mnot.

Here’s a picture because I can’t seem to pull anything together. It’s me actin’ like Madonna at my party – holding a Hannah Montana microphone… Yes – a confidence prop. Do you see a theme in my *ahem* prop-age? Glitter. I luvs me the shinies. *coughADDcough*

I totally just posted another picture of myself. I have issues. You know what! Tomorrow is Make Me Laugh Monday. Come to think of it, tomorrow is My actual birthday! Since tomorrow is both My birthday and MMLM, I will… I will… post something that makes me laugh on my birthday! I overwhelm Myself. Are you overwhelmed with Myself too?

What honey? The phone is for me? … Who? Oh. O.K. Tell my therapist I am finishing another post about me and I will be right there. I know these bi-daily ‘get over yourself’ sessions are expensive, but I really think we are finally making some real progress…

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Could that title be any more cheesy? And beingassuch I am a huge fan of cheese (extra-sharp cheddar, thankyouverymuch!), that title works for me! And also, this post will not be about cheese.

Because I am typing and processing thought(s) on 4 hours of sleep… because my feet are KILLING me due to the fact I know no other way than to dance but like a lunatic… because I just can’t wait to share… I will post a few pictures from my party last night… can you feel the love?

Did somebody say glitter?

What do you get when 4 girls get ready for the 20th anniversary of some crazy-lady’s 16th birthday in ONE bathroom?

Oh my gosh! Girls! Do remember that – getting ready for the football game.. getting ready for the dance? My bathroom is coated with a fine layer of glitter… and it smells real purty…

OK. So, I had 2 costumes “get-ups” looks for my party. The first half of the evening I wore my old cheer uniform. Don’t be THAT impressed. I was never a skinny cheerleader. Now, please do not critique my form. I know what is wrong with this picture beside the fact that I am a grown woman wearing a cheer uniform, and beside the fact that my friend Casey has that Jack Nicholson smile… but in her defense I think she had A LOT of glitter in her eyes…

Don’t you just love Casey! She flew in from Arizona. Surprised me. Like, totally! I cried. 

Uh… DISCO BALL!

Some of you may not know that Simon Le Bon of Duran Duran and I share the same birthday. If ever I had a claim to fame – that’d be it. Of course, we had to celebrate him too!

I gave Simon a special spot at our my party.

This is not the end of the story, but I need to take my sister to the airport and act like I do other things besides celebrate my birthday and blog. But, I do want to share 1 more picture with you. This is what my hair looked like this morning. My hair looked exactly how my feet feel right now… BAD!

I wish I didn’t have to wrap this up! I have so many thank you’s and virtual smooches to give…

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Up until now this post has been my most political. Truth be told, I am afraid of The Public and know politics brings out “the uglies”. Being-as-so I am not a huge fan of “ugly” I tend to keep my politics to my own bad self. 

Are you familiar with Facebook? I am not chasing a tangent, stick with me… Recently, Lisa and I formed a new group on Facebook – The Dance Party (which is explained a bit better at the bottom of this post). The purpose of The Dance Party is to bring The People (Democrats & Republicans… even Independents) together… on The Dance Floor. I am the Self-Proclaimed and Never-To-Be-Dethroned President of The Dance Party, and Lisa is my Most Distinguished V.P.

In keeping with her duties to support and further our cause, Lisa found the following video. And because I am committed to You – My Public – I am passing it on… Because I care about You. Because I want You to vote. Because I want You to… dance. Plus, I know many of My Friends who visit here are also Dance-aholics, and I am all about supportin’ the habit, yo. 

Now THIS is a debate I could TOTALLY get in on.

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