Jenny On the Spot: Caffeinated mom, lover of dancing, glitter and glitter.

Huh? Yeah, that’s what I said when Katie spoke that litany of consonants and vowels… She was onto somethin’. She’s a smart one. That’s why I keep her around… and she’s funny.

So, that “G” word… is when amino acids are broken down by the liver, or kidney, or both. Is there a doctor in the blogoshpere? Wikipedia has their explanation, but I might as well be solving a crossword puzzle in Chinese.

Why on earth would one’s liver… What are amino acids anyway? Protein… that’s part of it. Anywho. Apparently when one is exerting oneself in an exceptional manner, one’s body needs fuel. The first source of fuel are carbs. Is carbs. Are carbs. Carbs – plural or singular?… I get so distracted these days.

When the carbs are gone the body begins to metabolize fat, then protein (which is broken down into amino acids)… and apparently muscle tissue is protein. Ew. EW. Amino acids are the building blocks of protein. Whatever that means. Apparently, something happens with molecule stripping and nitrogen. Somewhere in there is where the ammonia smell is conceived. Does this make any sense? Does anyone care?

I’ll boil it down… you know, strip the nitrogen atom off the molecule, if you will… I need to eat more carbs so my body doesn’t metabolize my muscle. Ew. EW. This site is where I started my inquiry… Let me clarify 1 thing – no one else can smell ammonia on me. ew. Just me. In my nose. ick. The first time this happened I was in the shower at a local pool. If my friends were not there to tell me there really was NOT an ammonia smell in the building, I might have alerted the lifeguards and called 911. Imagine me having to tell the HAZMAT crew, “I’m sorry, I shoulda eaten more oatmeal. Do you have a protein bar in that bright orange bag of yours? I need to replace some muscle tissue. Pronto.”