Monthly Archive for December, 2005
I took out the cheese grater, to grate some cheese (go figure). The cheese played the role of “cholesterol garnish” to our tasty, leftover-from-Christmas-Eve baked-potato soup. As the grater emerged from my cupboard, I had a thought… “I am grater!”
I said to my husband, I says, “I think I wish I was a grater so I could say, ‘I am greater’ without feeling as though I were boasting.” I held the grater high in my right hand.
Hubby said, “Oh, come on now, that would just be… cheesey.”
Our kids are so lucky. BOTH parents are incredibly quick-witted and comical, even edgy. By having both our jeans genes, certainly they are destined for grateness greatness :)
For Christmas, one of the gifts my sister-in-law’s husband gave her was a game called Would You Rather…?. We didn’t end up playing the game, but I did manage to sort through a few of the questions. It was ridiculous, really. We laughed so hard I was worried I would pop my eye stitches. I think the game should give a warning to those with weak bladders, “Danger, intense laughter may cause an accident, wear Depends.”
I thought I’d pose a couple of the questions here…
While watching The Chronicles of Narnia yesterday, my SIL was reminded of one of the questions we pondered that morning. As creatures were dropping large rocks from the sky, my sister-in-law quietly leaned over and asked the question we pondered earlier, “Would you rather it rain rocks the size of baseballs for a year – or – darts?” Like I said, ridiculous.
The one that put my intact eye stitches in jeopardy was the following: Would you rather have brown teeth, or a hairline that begins one half inch above your eyebrows? Ewwwww…
If I HAD to choose I\’d choose raining darts and brown teeth (I wonder if halitosis is indicative of that condition?…) I’m curious, what would you choose???
No son, Daddy said, “Hot Buttered RUM…”
Subject: Little Sister Lucy
Artist: Big Sister Olivia
Due to SPAM via trackbacks, I have disabled my trackbacks option. Grrr….comment/trackback spam…
I received so many kind wishes and empathy about my eye-recovery. Thank you all so very much! I am pleased to report I feel much better since the surgery one week ago yesterday. I saw the doctor on Tuesday and half the stitches were removed (they were pulling my lower lid down a little much). I also received the lab results. The little bothersome bump turned out to be what is called a Schwannoma. It was explained to me to be a cluster of cells that gather ’round nerve tissue. This cluster was benign – woohoo! I get the remaining stitches out next week, and once all the swelling is gone I will get a fun CT scan to make sure eveything was removed.
I want to send a specila thanks to my friend Julie. She saw my post-surgical post in which I mentioned the lack of powdered sugar at the grocery store. Imagine my joy yesterday morningshe showed up on my doorstep with two bags of powdered sugar!!! Thank you Julie!!! And again, thank you everyone for your well wishes!
Code Name: Mommy created a wonderful “20 Things” post… I just have to pass it on! I could write a whole essay on #18!!!
As I checked-out at the grocery store tonight — by the way, the store – The. Entire. Store. Was. Out. Of. Powdered. Sugar. Out. Of. Powdered. Sugar. Can you hear me throwing my arms up in the air?
I digress, the checker asked about my eye. Some people ask about my eye, some try not to stare, and some may not notice because my glasses camouflage the affected area quite well. I told the checker-gal the story – “tumor”, stitches, benign (which is actually quite wonderful news!!!), yadda, yadda, yadda – we wished each other a Merry Christmas and me and my swollen eye carted our purchases to the car.
As I guided the car through the rain and dark, I was struck; not by another moving vehicle, but by a thought. I have this bum eye – the swelling, the stitches, a bit of shiny gleam when I have my antibiotic ointment on, and even a bit of redness. I could take another path. I could tell a tale so incredible, so amazing I could evoke a gasp, a wince, or maybe (just maybe) get a “hand-over-wide-open-mouth-because-it’s-so-incredible” reaction! I’m getting giddy just thinking of the possibilities…
Maybe I should be saying:
I just got back from Hawaii. I went cliff-diving…
A bungee-jumping accident…
I am a hang-glider-tester-person. The hang-glider didn’t pass the test…
I’m in construction, it was a bad situation with a 2×4 and a nail gun…
It is a work-related injury, but I can’t tell you what I do or I’d have to kill you…
I fell off the couch and landed on an ornament…
I fell off the couch and landed on a tinker toy…
I fell off my porch and landed on one of my sharp tin votive holders…
I finally got my official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle and I shot my eye out!!!…
I went to a peace rally…
Shark attack – my amazing story of survival will be featured on the Discovery Channel\’s newest hit “I Shouldn’t Be Alive” next month. Check your local listings…
As I walked through the grocery store today, I felt like I received a few awkward glances. Maybe it was because I had my sick baby snotting all over my shoulder (cute as a snotty button with her Santa cap on) OR maybe it’s because my right eye looks like this:
On Thursday, I had an “orbital tumor” removed from under my right eye. To the touch it felt like a small thing, but once the doctor got in it was bigger than expected – 1.5 centimeters by 1.5 centimeters. It was really stuck onto the skin as well. The original plan was to remove it from behind the lower lid, but because of the complications I had to be cut-up on the outside. I counted 7 or 8 stitches. The cyst/tumor was sent to “the lab”, but the doctor said he thinks it looks fine. I should find out the lab results on Monday.
Amazingly, my eye doesn’t look as bad as I anticipated, and it looks better now than it did Thursday evening… I told my Mom and Dad I’d post a picture for them, so… what do you think Mom and Dad???
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