Someone recently said my kids are high-maintenance. At first I brushed it off because it hurt my feelings and I thought it\’d be best just to let it roll off. Then I decided to NOT let it hurt my feelings and just chalk it up as circumstances during a phase of life. I need to just admit it. It really did bother me and now I find myself analyzing this potentially complex tree of behavior - my children\’s and my own as a parent.
Here are some things about my kids that some may perceive as \”high-maintenance issues\”:
Joel (almost 6) - He likes his chips in a bowl, fruit in a bowl, and for his food not to touch on his plate, unless he dips it himself. He doesn\’t like his utensils to be sticky. He doesn\’t like his hands dirty, or his socks all bunchy in his shoes (likewise). He is not attached to a particular cup or bowl, but he often wants the one his sister gets:) He knows what clothes he likes and does not like. He prefers sweat pants (me too). He talks - a lot. He talks - loud and with passion. He doesn\’t like it when his food breaks (like a popscicle off it\’s stick). He is used to and comfortable with the way mom and dad give him his medicine. He asks, \”Why\” a whole heck of a lot. He likes COLD water.Olivia (3) - She also likes her chips in a bowl, or fruit, or any side item. When she is done with pieces of her meal (the rind, crust, etc…) she sets it on the table instead of leaving it on ther plate - no trash on the plate, you see. She changes her clothes - A LOT. She still needs to be wiped after going potty. She spills something at every meal/snack, and she asks for food all the time - really. No, REALLY:) She likes to put on her own socks, shoes, and clothes. She likes to brush her own teeth . She talks all the time - really. No, REALLY. Realy, truly, the girl has the gift of gab.
Together - they rough-house, snuggle, play with and provoke each other.
As I run through he list of the things that may categorize my kiddos as \”high-maintenance\” I must reflect on my parenting. Have I created demanding children? I believe the most truthful answer is probably (I let them have their chips and fruit in bowls!). However, many have said I am much too hard on myself. So…
I conclude, I can admit my kids may require some maintenence, and thus provoke some feelings of exhasperation. BUT… my kids are, well, kids! They are 5 (almost 6) and 3. There are 2 of them. They are young - preschoolers. AND they both have pretty dynamic personalities, by this I mean that they are not quiet or mellow by nature. Neither are their parents:) I guess when it comes down to it I feel my kids are regular \’ol kids with their own set of funny personality quirks. They exhaust me. I\’ve heard that the children of other parents exhaust them too. I\’m pretty sure this is true and not a myth.
*Ahhhh* A sigh of comfort and satisfaction. I have regular \’ol precious, impossible, irresistible, snuggly, messy (Olivia), obsessive (Joel), lovable kids. They\’re mine and I\’m tickled that I get to be their mama.




The next time this person or anyother person suggests that your children are “high maintenance,” simply smile sweetly and reply:
Oh no, you are confusing high maintenance with a refined sense of decision making ability and an understanding that they have the right to make individual choices.
I was going to respond in my own way but Michele put it in perfect words!!!
I have never met a child who wasn\’t high maintenance - it\’s their nature. My kids are high maintenance. I myself am on of the most high maintenance people I know. I don\’t see it as a bad thing. I want things as certain way. Now I can accept other ways if necessary. This is the skill children are still working on. I wouldn\’t take it as an insult, and actually I would wonder about a person whose kids WEREN\’T high maintenance!
High maintenance? I think they just sound like miniature versions of their grown-up selves. Know what I mean? I certainly have opinions about how I like to eat, dress, and do just about everything. Why shouldn\’t kids have them, too?
I\’m feeling clueless, what\’s wrong with having chips or fruit in a bowl? Nothing you listed can compare to the maintenance demanded by my 11 year old niece. :-)
last time I checked…you have kids, not cats. Kids ARE high maintenance - anyone not wanting a high maintenance kid should get a cat :)