Jenny On the Spot

Spanking. It\’s controversial. It\’s a parenting choice, for now… This post sparked my gut. She linked to an article — \”To spank or not? Let the town vote.\”.

A woman noted in the article had spanked her 11 year-old daughter years before and remembers crying for 25 minutes after. This woman \”has a clear memory of when her own father hit her with a belt after she had crossed a street without looking both ways. \’I don\’t like power as a way of solving problems…. We just took it for granted.\’\” Yes, one must be careful when one has the ability to use it. Clearly, adults have a \”power\” advantage over children. James 1:20 says,\” The anger of man does not achieve the righteouness of God.\” Parents have a HUGE responsibility…and anger has no place in the discipline of a child.

Joel ran into a very busy parking lot when he was about 2. I spanked him, and then I cried on the curb for several minutes. I did not cry because I regreted spanking him, but because my son could have been killed that afternoon. That next fall at preschool, he was the kid warning the other kids about going in the parking lot without their mom. Ecclesiastes 8:11 says, \”When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.\” Joel didn\’t commit a crime, but he did something that was life-threathening.

Ron Goldman, the fellow who started this resolution, said,

There\’s a reason for social concern about what goes on in the family because it does have social consequences for all of us.

I agree, but not in the way he intended. These social consequences are why we need to be able to choose how we disciplin, adn that we do discipline. The social consequences for permissive parenting are severe. We see it in today\’s youth\’s disregard for authority and blatant lack of respect for others - old and young. Ron\’s perspective is skewed and severely shortsighted. It lacks a view of the bigger picture.

It seems that in the world Ron hopes for, it is \”admirable\” to allow children all sorts of adult privileges. This permissiveness is destroying the innocence of our children. I strongly believe children should be protected from the fast-paced trend toward making kids be adult-like. For example, kids are allowed to drink, smoke, have sex, you name it, as long as they are under the roof of their parent\’s home. Little girls are paraded around to look like teens, who themselves look like women (minus hips). I\’ve heard the arguments in support of this parenting style, and I don\’t buy any of them. MY children are going to meet THOSE children and be enticed and exposed.

I hope I can protect Joel and Livi from experiencing \”life\” before they need to. I want to preserve their innocence as long as I can. Burdens will weigh heavy enough later on, they won\’t be \”missing out\”. Paul and I are working to raise our children to battle life\’s wars with courage and strength, as adults. We cannot control all things, s0 we need to be intentional in how we raise them now. It breaks this mother\’s heart that they may need to weather such storms… I pray that the storms won\’t come while they are too young - and at the expense of their innocence..