It seems like is was a week of “guy time” for my husband and son. Last weekend they went to Boys Camp. For several years, some friends organize a camp for dads and their sons. This was Paul and Joel’s second year. Rumor has it (though no woman has crossed the bounds of this boy-only event) that upon arrival, the boys rush out of their vehicles and find their sticks. The entire weekend is a battle of ninja swords, guns, and any other kind of potential assault device. Amazingly, they come home safe and sound:)
While the boys were gone, me and my girl went shopping. I took Livi to Seattle and we hopped from shop to shop, enjoying a latte here and a latte there…. Ahh, the life! She enjoyed the hubub of life in the city. She asked about all the noises (”What’s that noise?!), and was particularly interested in the man with the bagpipe. The next day I devoted my time to cleaning a much-neglected bathroom, and rented a movie. Oh, I blogged abunch too!! I had planned to hang out with a girlfriend and her daughter (same aga as Livi), but I suddenly got task-minded and flaked out.
The boys returned and it took a few days for Joel to emotionally adjust to the civilized world. I think he’s come back to us - the haircut on Wednesday probably helped too:)
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Joel and Paul went with another father and son to a Mariner\’s game last week. It was just the dads and their boys. Joel and his friend has a great time (hot dogs, peanuts, they sang \”Take me out to the ballgame\” at the seventh inning stretch…you name it!), and my boy was wiped out by the time he got home (actually, both of them!)! It\’s a bit of a walk from Safeco Field to the ferry. Paul said Joel rode on his shoulders most of the walk back. Later this month, Paul will be taking Joel to another Mariner\’s game for his Joel\’s 5th birthday… he is becoming such a big boy!
We saw a crab - probably dead. I\’m chicken-mom and didn\’t check!
The tide is getting low! The water is shallow for quite some distance! It was a great day at the beach!
I called a good friend yesterday. I was seeking out advice from a more \”experienced\” mom, so I stepped outside the preschool-mom circle. Joel has been lying lately, and I am looking for a great way to deal with that natural inclination Truthfully, I\’m looking for a unique, even outstanding way. There are all the \”old stand-bys\” (time-outs, etc…), but both my hubby and I feel we need to really focus and seek out a different method. I wrote in my previous post that Joel lied to his teacher about peeing outside during playtime.
Yesterday, I caught him in a pretty bold lie abou his pb&j sandwich. He brought an empty plate. I asked if he had eaten all his sandwich, crust, everything… checked the TOP of the table. Yup, it was gone. I gave him great kuddos and praised him highly in front of the other moms and kids - I love to go all-out for the good stuff! At naptime, while cleaning, I found the 3-bites-eaten sandwich, below the table.
I called my friend. She had some terrific advice. I had thought about not letting our family go to our small group time, because Joel loves it so much, but she suggested a time-out AT small group instead. Whay have the family pay his consequences as well??? So… while the kids were-a-playin\’, Joel was a-sittin\’. I gave him 6 minutes. That was plenty of time given the atmosphere!
Another idea was using a \”trust cup\” as an example. Here\’s what I did. I got 2 glasses (Joel is particularly fond of the adult glasses), and filled one full with water. We sat at the table and I showed him the full \”trust cup\”. I explained that when he is truthful the \”trust cup\” is full. Then I demonstrated that with each lie, the trust cup grows empty. He did not like that. I demonstrated further that it takes many more truths to fill the \”trust cup\” than lies to empty it. He was pretty frustrated when the \”trust cup\” was emptied. I explained that today the \”trust cup\” is full (starting over) and encouraged him to try to keep it that way. He seemed pretty on-board.
I have a hunch the \”trust cup\” analogy will need to be revisited, but I am pretty excited about our moment this morning. He has an understanding of \”trust\”. He says, \”Just trust me!!\” when we are seeking truthful answers (and he is not being truthful). I believe the cup analogy is not above his understanding. Now, we need to take him to apologize to Mrs. Cindy…
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